The Godfather undermines Fatherhood.

Getting Snipped is now the quickest path to becoming a High-Value Man?  (Rollo Tomassi’s views on vasectomy.)

Readership: All
Theme: Honoring Fathers; Cultural Demise
Length: 2,000 words
Reading Time: 10 minutes + 18 minute video

Introduction

In May of this year, Rollo endorsed men getting a vasectomy in a tweet (which has since been deleted) in which he said this was necessary to become a “high value man”.

The response? He was roundly hit with criticism and incredulity from all over the Men’s Sphere.

In case you missed it, here’s a video commentary from MTR covering Rollo’s spar with Destiny and Sneako on the topic.

Mediocre Tutorials and Reviews: Red Pill Godfather EXPOSED by Sneako and Destiny (2023/5/14) Length: 17:52

The Godfather really goofed on this one.

Confused about His Role

The main contention arose because people naturally read Rollo’s tweet as a blanket truth coming from the Godfather. However, a tweet is insufficient to fully explain all the specific contexts and motivations that are assumed in his statement. Things only got worse when he refused to walk back on the statement in his tweet — that getting a vasectomy is the way to become a high quality man. Instead, he continually buffered and couched his statements, saying things like, “It’s data, not advice”, even though the only way younger men could interpret his stance as an RP Elder is as advice. Instead, he should have explained all the assumptions and conditions under which his statement is true, and compared that to all the assumptions and conditions under which it is NOT. But of course, this is too much information to put into one tweet.

The way I see it, Rollo is suffering from a lack of social self-awareness, resulting in poor communication. Rollo’s current role in the Manosphere is different from what it was in the days of the Old Manosphere, and he’s having trouble with the PR details of recasting himself as a Red Pill authority to newer generations. As before, he is broadcasting himself as a philosopher who is an expert on intersexual relations, but he fails to acknowledge the immutable authority of his words as the last standing godfather of the classic original Manosphere.  (The other two were Roissy and Roosh.)

Another issue is that he is using certain catch phrases that each man could interpret differently (e.g. “high quality / value man”), and making broad statements without defining the context.  This is one thing Kevin Samuels always took care to avoid.  He defined the term “High Value Men” in nearly every discussion he had, because he knew that his viewers would have their own ideas or else define it to be whatever they wanted.  Rollo seems to be aware of this, but he fails to explain the psychological dynamics at play within his audience and break the fifth wall* effectively (with respect to men’s interests).

This doesn’t fly with his younger audience of Manospherians.  They are intent on getting actionable knowledge, and miss the fact that he’s just tossing out ideas and theories without framing it in the context he assumes, and without much thought about how this will be received by his audiences.

Rollo is no longer just a top rate Red Pill philosopher. Now, he is also an elder, a teacher, and a mentor, whether he likes or wants these roles or not. Now as a sage authority, Rollo must pay excruciating detail to every word he says and how that will be taken by his audiences, much like what he has done in his writings. Rollo should have stuck to blogging and writing books.  His books and blog posts will outlive him, but his podcasts won’t. But this will not change as long as his podcasts are earning him $$$.

One thing Rollo’s critics get wrong is in thinking he is a Boomer.  (Rollo’s birthday was on 1969/4/2, making him an Xer.)  Or maybe this is merely intended as a slur on his age.

* Breaking the fifth wall is to address the meta dynamics and the motives within the context of the current discussion. This is a key element of maintaining an effective argument in the 21st century.

Rollo’s Views on Vasectomies

I decided all this contention was worthy of digging into Rollo’s views of vasectomies in the past, so I swallowed my deep revulsion of this topic and took a dive into the annals of The Rational Male. Relevant excerpts follow.

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“There is no more permanent a devotion to the male sexual strategy than to get a vasectomy and thus deny a woman the ultimate culmination of her own.  If you ever want to experience just how close to livestock the Feminine Imperative considers men to be, just try getting a vasectomy before you’re married or without a wife’s explicit and written consent.  Legally it’s easier to geld horses or neuter dogs.”

The Rational Male: Making Up for Missing Out (2015/3/16)

In general, Rollo supports vasectomies as a form of responsible birth control for men who are sexually active and do not want an unintended pregnancy.  But in reality, this is only an appropriate choice for men who do not want to have children EVER.  Furthermore, this is a secular view that is explicitly anti-family.

“One reason I don’t think Vasalgel will be legalized for mass consumption (or will eventually meet stiff legislative resistance) is because it puts a measure of Hypergamous control in the hands of men.  We’ve already seen attempts to make ‘sex by deception’ equitable with r@pe.  And we’ve already seen the legislation that makes even approaching a woman on the street equitable with a hate crime.  My guess is that not disclosing a guy is on Vasalgel or he’s had a vasectomy could easily be construed as such too.”

The Rational Male: Spare the Rod,… (2016/10/2)

In the two quotes above, Rollo breaks the fifth wall by presenting a vasectomy as a way for men to take control of their reproductive choices in a way that allows them to continue having profligate sex, but still avoid being manipulated, pressured, or used by women or society at large.

IOW, Rollo is assuming that a man’s motivation is to have as much illicit sex as possible without being held accountable for it. This is basically the male version of the feminist standpoint on abortion and birth control.

Another thing implicit to the context he describes is that said men are immersed in a gynocentric culture that penalizes men for being fathers instead of honoring them.

I would agree that under the above assumptions / conditions his statement may very well be true for such a man.

However, outside of this context, in fact, taking this route is throwing the baby out with the bathwater, quite literally.

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“You will never be appreciated for your sacrifices, and certainly not while you’re making them.  Your presence is only as superfluous as you allow it to be.  While you will never be appreciated for it in any measurable sense, you will be liable for it, so my advice is to make the most of it in a Red Pill respect.  Your reward, your motivation, for being a Red Pill parent and a positively masculine example in your kids’ lives needs to come from inside yourself because it will never be rewarded by a feminine-primary social order.  If you don’t think you will ever find being a parent intrinsically rewarding, get a vasectomy now because it will never be extrinsically rewarding.”

The Rational Male: Red Pill Parenting – Part II (2015/10/14)

Here, Rollo focuses on personal rewards and takes a negative view of being a parent, but he fails to consider the metaphysical, psychological, and spiritual benefits of being a virile man and being a father, e.g. the calling of Headship, the development of identity, having a sphere of authority, the joy of having children and grandchildren, and so on.

“In Selective Breeding, I made the argument that Women’s Existential Fear is the possibility of having her Hypergamous filter (feminine intuition) fooled by a Beta male and becoming saddled with his shitty genetics for the rest of her life.  This is a primal, evolved, fear for women that manifest itself, often unconsciously, in many of women’s behaviors that we either take for granted or we have social conventions that accommodate them.  Decidedly gynocentric societies will legally mandate against this existential fear.

But what about women who are already married or pair-bonded with men that their evolved subconscious knows is a suboptimal choice for her? What about women who are trapped in a marriage with a guy that her hindbrain confirms is not the ‘best she can do’? How does that primal fear of being saddled with a faithful Beta manifest itself?”

The Rational Male: Unconscious Contempt (2019/11/15)

Rollo goes on to answer these questions by saying in so many words that women feel comfortable – to the point of taking it for granted – in expressing passive-aggressive contempt for their husbands and veiling this contempt in humor and teasing.  This is the main point of his entire post.

In the same post, he writes,

“I feel it’s incumbent upon me to address what will be the predictable binary responses of literalist critics here:

• No, I’m not saying don’t get a vasectomy.
• No, I’m also not saying that if you did get a vasectomy you’re a pathetic loser Beta.

Judging by his other views expressed, these statements are merely politically correct buffers intended to reduce backlash.  A comprehensive understanding of this post as well as his other writings, tweets, and statements in recent podcasts illustrates that he IS telling men to get a vasectomy IF they want to be a high value man, and yet, if you’ve read any of his works and have paid attention, it is understood that they are pathetic evolutionary losers if they DO.

So how else are younger men supposed to interpret this double talk?

They are right to castigate Rollo on this point.

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Returning to the last part of the last essay quoted above, Rollo smears a salty salve on the slashed scrotum sack as follows.

“I will however point out that when I see stories about how a Beta husband did come to the decision to get a vasectomy there are always a lot of subconscious reasonings that go along with it.  For all the notions of egalitarian marriages and self-praise for being rationally evolved above the hindbrain interpretations, on some level of consciousness a man electing to sterilize himself is a confirmation of the value he puts in his masculinity.  This is why women think it’s funny to ridicule your impotency.  Her hindbrain has 100% confirmation that you know your reproductive viability has no value.

A man’s reasons for getting a vasectomy may be valid and in some ways empowering for him.  I imagine there’s at least some confidence to be derived from knowing you won’t be held responsible for any “accidental” pregnancies.  I get why men would opt for it, but the way a woman’s feral brain interprets a man sterilizing himself is what I’m getting at here.  You may think, “Well, I don’t give a damn what women think about it.”  Fine.  Totally valid, but I’m outlining a woman’s instinctual response to a man permanently preventing his own reproduction.  There is a subcommunication underneath this decision that denotes emasculation, and this is what women resent.”

“In some ways I see wives celebrating their husband’s vasectomy for reasons that have nothing to do with improving their sex lives.  In the original Twitter thread, I had men tell me that they got a vasectomy at the suggestion of their wives, believing it would lead to greater sexual frequency (or any sex in a sexless marriage) only to admit that it never improved anything for them.  So, why the goading to get a vasectomy?  The dots I keep connecting are a subconscious desire on the part of women to geld a husband to ensure he never reproduces with other women.  It’s almost like a service she’s doing for the Sisterhood.  She’s making sure that her mistake never becomes any other woman’s mistake.”

The Rational Male: Unconscious Contempt (2019/11/15)

So, if I am getting this right, Rollo thinks Alpha men are maximizing their sexual strategy by getting a vasectomy.  But Beta men are a laughingstock and are cucking themselves for doing the same.

Conclusions

For many men, including myself, being a father is one of the key achievements of a life well lived. But Rollo offers a no-win strategy for those men who feel called to be a father.

Whether being a parent is intrinsically or extrinsically rewarding or not is unique to each man, and this is a separate (but related) question from the younger men’s focus on becoming a high quality / high value man.  Rollo failed to make this key distinction.

Also, Rollo fails to recognize the fact that men’s SMV rises as they age and thus, getting a vasectomy at a young age could jinx a man’s strategy later in life.

MTR suggested other ways for men to take responsibility for their sexuality (e.g. abstinence, condoms) without getting the snip.  But Rollo never satisfactorily answered the question of why a vasectomy is absolutely necessary for a man to quickly become “high value”.

In all, I’d say Rollo is taking his evo-psyche philosophies to their fullest logical conclusion as applied ONLY to the present SMP in the debauched West, but he fails to reconcile this with the foundational principle that evo-psyche assumes reproduction as an incontrovertible necessity.

Related

• Dalrock: Mentu’s moving vasectomy post. (2012/9/12)
• The Rational Male: Secret of the Sperm Bank (2014/1/29)
• X-Splat: If you respect Rollo Tomassi you have been brainwashed into accepting total loserdome for the rest of your life. (2018/9/25)
• The Rational Male: Selective Breeding (2019/9/3)
• Σ Frame: Irresponsible Ejaculation Causes Abortion (2019/9/23)
• Adam Piggott: The Secret to saving your Marriage (2023/7/12) [Reblogged on XYZ.]