50 Shades of Discipline in Marriage

The book, Fifty Shades of Grey, has sold over 125 million copies worldwide, and has topped best-seller lists around the world. It set a record in the United Kingdom as the fastest-selling paperback of all time. It is the highest-grossing sex film in the U.S. and Canada, and we know that women constitute the vast constituency of fandom. The success of this book and film cannot make the truth any clearer:

Women desperately want to be disciplined! They fantasize about sexual coercion!

As we already know, women want to be loved and desired, and discipline is a very powerful way to instill feelings of love within their hearts. When a man disciplines his wife, he is also loving her! She will agree with this, because from her perspective, she feels loved when he lays down the law and plays the Dread Game. And, we all know how important the feelz are to women!

There are many passages in the Bible which clearly state that love and success is associated with, and expressed through discipline, and this is applicable through many types of relationships:

Judging by the success of Fifty Shades of Grey, I presume this Biblical principle can legitimately be extended to apply for husbands disciplining wives. Let’s consider this perspective from the Biblical view.

Proverbs 3:11-12; Hebrews 12:5-6 (NKJV)

My son, do not despise the chastening of the Lord, Nor detest His correction; For whom the Lord loves He corrects, Just as a father the son in whom he delights.

Proverbs 3:11-12; Hebrews 12:5-6 (NSFV*)

My daughter, do not despise the chastening of your husband and lord, Nor detest his correction; For the wife who is loved is brought into line, Just as Christian Grey subjugated the virgin Anastasia Steele and taught her BDSM.

Proverbs 13:24 (NKJV)

“He who spares his rod hates his son, But he who loves him disciplines him promptly.”

Proverbs 13:24 (NSFV*)

“He who flagellates his rod hates his wife, But he who loves his wife, shags her promptly.”

Hebrews 12:7-11 (NKJV)

7 If you endure chastening, God deals with you as with sons; for what son is there whom a father does not chasten? 8 But if you are without chastening, of which all have become partakers, then you are illegitimate and not sons. 9 Furthermore, we have had human fathers who corrected us, and we paid them respect. Shall we not much more readily be in subjection to the Father of spirits and live? 10 For they indeed for a few days chastened us as seemed best to them, but He for our profit, that we may be partakers of His holiness. 11 Now no chastening seems to be joyful for the present, but painful; nevertheless, afterward it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.

Hebrews 12:7-11 (NSFV*)

7 If a woman endures chastening, then her husband is dealing with her as with a wife; for what wife is there whom a husband does not chasten? 8 But if a woman is without chastening, of which, only feminists have refused to become partakers, then she is a short-term pump-and-dump, and not a wife. 9 Furthermore, women have had alpha-cad boyfriends who corrected them, and they paid them respect. Shall women not much more readily be in subjection to their lawfully wedded husbands and live? 10 For their alpha-cad boyfriends indeed for a few days chastened those carousel riders as seemed best for their selfish purposes, but husbands chasten wives for their own good, that they may yield sandwiches, bare-back sex, and child bearing, with honor and glory. 11 Now no chastening seems to be joyful for the present, but painful; nevertheless, afterward it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.

* New Sigma Frame Version

Remember husbands, you’ve got to out-perform all your wife’s previous lovers in the way of authoritative discipline, in order to own her… heart, mind and soul… lock, stock and barrel. She will never tell you the details of those experiences, so you’ve got to blow past the furthest expanses of her imagination. Let’s start with Christian Grey’s example, since we know that will definitely get a woman’s attention. Here are a few takeaways from the film.

  • Insist that your wife sign a non-disclosure agreement forbidding her from discussing anything you do together. Don’t talk to her until she signs it.
  • Inform her that the second contract will be one of dominance and submission at Biblical proportions not seen since Medieval times. There will be no romance, and no contrivances with her relatives, only one of dutiful, daily carnal knowledge. Make sure the contract forbids her from touching you without an invitation, or making eye contact with you. It should also include a list of specific foods she may eat, and the total number of calories she may consume in one day.
  • Buy her a mobile phone for her to use to communicate with you, and to make appointments to see you. As a token of trust and good will, be willing to listen to her hard and soft limits, and then dismiss them out of hand, saying that you will take that into consideration “IF it becomes necessary”. Tell her that the grounds for “necessary” are subject to your discretion, not hers.
  • Spank her bare butt whenever she is speaking brashly or is disobedient longer than 10 seconds. Use push-pull and the Shogun method to turn her on, and make her confused, so that she continues to be gratefully dependent on you.
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About Wayne

Wayne is an ordained minister of Love who studies the psychology of the Feminine Mystique during the day, and holds an undercover missionary position at night. He earned his Ph.D. in Transcendental Love Mechanics during a 12-year, self-imposed asylum in an east-Asian paradise. You can visit his solid blog for more liquid insights: Sigma Frame Where Frame is the Name of the Game!
This entry was posted in Discipline, Game, Male Power, Models of Success, Purpose, Relationships, Satire and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to 50 Shades of Discipline in Marriage

  1. Sapphire Morningstar says:

    I always thought the reason why women like 50 shades of grey was because they want that alpha male but they’re with a beta and thus find him boring. Feminism is to blame for this. Too many women will deny this, but we do crave it. If we didn’t, we wouldn’t like books like this, or fictional characters like Thor & Captain America.

    Like

  2. Anti-Gnostic says:

    I’m going to assume that this blog site is merely a parody of various manosphere sites, as the “advice” here is a wonderful mix of psychotic neuroticism.

    Like

    • Sigma Frame says:

      Anti-Gnostic, thank you! Many posts incorporate satire, mock seriousness, logical contraptions, coded language, and various types of rhetorical devices. Many posts are zealously religious, which can be ironically funny and riveting at the same time. I believe humor combined with reason is a very effective way to apprehend hard, unpleasant truths and get a clearer vision of life. Humor has a way of cutting through pride, prejudice, pretenses, and preconceived notions like nothing else. Besides, I hope to lighten up the Manosphere a little bit, as it has too much anger, bitterness, grief and nihilism as it stands. It is not my intention to parody the Manosphere in a condescending manner, but I know some of my posts come out looking that way. Here, I don’t mean to downplay or be nonchalant about the very real suffering and injustices which are addressed in the Manosphere, but just want to balance that out by offering a different perspective, a shock, a laugh, a satisfying punch in the gut to personified evils, or a glimmer of hope. This too, is an important part of apprehending the truth.

      Like

  3. Pingback: Disciplined, Submissive, Happy Wives | Σ Frame

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