80’s dating as portrayed in films of the era.
Theme: Dating and the SMP
Author’s Note: This post was cowritten by Jack and Deti. Deti mentioned some of these films in several comments.
Length: 2,300 words
Reading Time: 8 minutes + a total of about 37 minutes of video excerpts from old movies.
Teenage Romantic Comedies of the 80s
This month’s theme is about Dating and the SMP. To kick things off, this post will review several films from yesteryear that I’ve collected here for the sake of having a little snapshot of 80s pop history. This should give us an idea of how far we’ve regressed.
The Wedding Singer (1998 ca. 1985)
In 1985, Robbie Hart (Adam Sandler) is an engaging and entertaining wedding singer from Ridgefield, New Jersey. He is engaged to his long-time girlfriend, Linda (Angela Featherstone), but she dumps him at the altar because he became a wedding singer instead of a rock star.
Robbie meets and befriends a waitress, Julia Sullivan (Drew Barrymore), at the reception hall where he regularly performs. Julia is also engaged, to businessman Glenn Gulia (Matthew Glave). Hart promises to sing at their wedding. Through a series of unbelievable twists and dramatic turns, Julia decides to jilt Glenn and go for Robbie, just in the nick of time before the wedding.
Redpill is seeing through the lie that Julia would have left handsome, rich, jerky Glenn Goolia for Hart, simply because he’s so sweet and funny and Glenn is a bit of jerk! We know what would really go down — She’ll F*ck the musician and marry the rich jerk. AF/BB in action!
A Red Pill analysis would immediately see this sitromcom as a recipe for illicit sex on the fly!
- Aspiring rock star musician who has a tryst with an engaged woman — check.
- Rich guy who habitually cheats, even after marriage — check.
- Engaged woman has a liaison with a musician in her wedding troupe — check.
But incredibly, all these tropes flew under the radar because the entire movie casts Robbie Hart (Adam Sandler) as a hopeless doting idiotic simp who can call upon the immediate sympathies of rock star Billy Idol, Hell’s Angels thugs, bottom level SMV oddballs, and everyone else around them. This was held up as an icon of romanticism for the average man.
Some Kind of Wonderful (1987)
Working class misfits Keith Nelson (Eric Stoltz) and the tomgirlish Watts (Mary Stuart Masterson) are “good friends” (AKA the friend zone).
Watts dumps her best friend/first love (Keith Nelson) with some sappy tripe about wanting to be liked by him, and then immediately picks up with another guy.
But when Keith asks out the most popular girl in school, Amanda Jones (Lea Thompson), Watts realizes that “her feelings for him are much deeper”. In today’s Red Pill parlance, we would say that jealousy and preselection kicked in.
Meanwhile, Amanda has an ex-boyfriend from the rich side of town, Hardy Jenns (Craig Sheffer), which offers us an example of hypergamy. He also fits the bill as a Chadwick who plots trouble for Keith by inviting him and Amanda to a party after their date. Keith finds out about the plot, believing Amanda to be party to it, but goes ahead with the date anyway. In spite of this, he spends money he saved for college and roped in Watts to be a chauffeur to help make the date special. (He’s gotta work for her love and “convince” her!) At Jenns’s party, the timely arrival of other “misfits” saves Keith from being beaten up. Keith tells Jenns he is “over” and Amanda slaps Jenns’s face. In the end, Amanda decides that Keith is “too Beta”, and that she needs to learn to stand on her own — a nice homage to the Strong Independent Woman (SIW) archetype.
At the end, Keith catches up to Watts and they kiss, supporting the idea that men will take whatever they can get, and that the determined tomgirl wins in the end — more reinforcement for the SIW archetype.
Red Pill Analysis: Watts is a gold digger and branch swinger. She leads men on in an effort to make other men jealous. She habitually judges men, and calls them stupid and pathetic to their faces. She reads sex into every single statement, makes it out to be contemptible, and projects that onto men. Yet, the men are always on the ready to come bouncing back at her beck and call. That’s P*ssy Power!
Amanda is kind of the opposite from Watts. She’s pretty and sweet on the outside, but its all for attention and popularity, and therefore she’s totally unreliable as a partner. At the least expected moment, she’ll dump the guy she’s with just because she feeelz like it.
But somehow, we never identified these behaviors as being common, much less as attention wh0ring, female hypergamy, and branch swinging and how the men themselves enabled it. Instead, young men of the time watched this movie and idolized Watts as the perfect hot babe who “just needs a little lovin’.”
Pretty in Pink (1986)
Andie Walsh (Molly Ringwald) is another girl from the wrong side of town who is set forth as the zenith of beauty and love to die for. The movie drags us through the typical high school drama surrounding socioeconomic class based cliques, and Andie’s escapades with a few admirers, including Steff McKee (James Spader), Phil “Duckie” Dale (John Cryer), and Blane McDonough (Andrew McCarthy). At the end of the film, dopey drooling Blane declares his undying love for Andie at the prom. Then her date, Stuckie, calmly folds his hands and tells her to go to him. Stuckie immediately gets picked up by another girl who’s even hotter.
Duckie is the quintessential case study on what not to be and do as a man.
Redpill is seeing through the lie that some guy wrote in my HS yearbook: “Stay sweet and the girls will love you to death.”
Say Anything (1989)
Let’s not forget Say Anything, where babyface John Cusack does the ultimate in creepy by going to his ex-girlfriend, Lone Skye’s house at 10 p.m. holding up a boombox and blasting Peter Gabriel’s song, “In Your Eyes” – and this was touted as the very pinnacle in sexual attractiveness and relationship skill.
Here’s an excerpt of this movie for the younger audiences. The part described is shown at 3:03.
In all actuality, this was merely a display of desperate male thirst, which women eat up as a form of attention and validation. Considering all his humility and wearing his heart on his shirtsleeve, a Red Pill assessment would predict that Ione Skye’s character (Diane) would never go back to Cusack’s character (Lloyd). But this is not what we see in the movie. Instead, Diane goes to England on a college scholarship, and she reconciles with Lloyd, and invites him to travel to Britain with her. So in the end, Lloyd leaves his life to be with her. How f’ing Blue Pill is that? HE is leaving HIS life to follow a woman!
I know of too many relationships and marriages that have fallen apart or suffered mightily because he moved for her. He left a career or opportunities to follow a woman. Women hate it when men do this. Women have no respect for men who do this.
The thing is that this was the cultural zeitgeist circa 1977-1990. This is what boys were being raised on. This is what boys were being told to do and be. This – especially Say Anything – was held up as the gold standard for how women wanted to be treated and swooned over and claimed moistened their nether regions.
Pure bunk, every last bit of it.
Case Study — Jack’s Youth Pastor endorsed Say Anything
When I was in high school, I asked my youth pastor for some ideas about where to go and what to do on a date. Without hesitation, he told me to go see the movie, Say Anything, so I put that movie on my “to do list”. So both the content of that movie, and taking dates to see it, and movies like it, became my benchmark of male Christian behavior towards women.
But I never got many dates, and the few I had didn’t last longer than a couple outings.
When I told him, “It’s not working”, he told me, “Just be yourself.”
I asked him, “What do you mean, ‘be yourself’?”
He just sighed and glared at me as if I said something rude.
Overall, I could pick up that there was something he was not telling me. At another occasion, he confided in me that he had “dated hundreds of girls” while he was in high school and college. Since he was my youth pastor, I interpreted “dated” as something quite innocent, but by the time I reached my 30s, I realized that he was using this word as a polite euphemism for sex.
Yeah… my youth pastor!*
* For reference, my youth pastor was born in 1953, which puts his formative age right at the height of the Hippie movement of “Free Love”.
Looking back through the Red Pill Lens
When I watch these old films now, here’s what I see.
- Arrogant, self-centered teenage women.
- Pedestalized girls high on P*ssy Power.
- Men giving women the P*ssy Pass at every turn.
- Women picking and choosing among the men, double dipping, dropping one to pick up with another, and it’s all done with no common courtesy whatsoever.
- 70+% of these movies are consumed by female dialogue.
- The controlling, angry father archetype makes an appearance in every single movie.
- Men are dressed in the height of fashion (hairspray, round sunglasses, leather ties, trenchcoats, etc.)
- All the men are stuck in a hopeless Blue Pill mindset, doing backflips for modest female attention, a date, or a kiss. Chivalry anyone?
- Men have the deer in the headlights look, always looking at the girls with gaping mouths.
What is really amazing to me now is that we men swallowed all these Blue Pill tropes hook, line, and stinker. Only a select few men, like my pastor, were truly in the know about women, but they betrayed us all by pressing forth the Blue Pill standard.
Red Pill showed it for the BS it is. This isn’t how you get attractive. The truth is…
- Women want a sexy man who is already attractive to be accommodating and compliant towards her, and her alone.
- Women want a guy who could totally cheat on her anytime he wants, but he doesn’t.
- Women want a guy who is nice to her and is a total A-hole to everyone else.
That was, and still is, the truth.
Red Pill movies were present in the 80s, but few and far between
There were a couple exceptions to all the Blue Pill crap of the 1980s.
The Karate Kid (1984)
The Karate Kid depicted the lead character, Daniel, as a struggling young man who found a masculine mentor and role model in Mr. Miyagi. Daniel had some Game and was nice enough looking.
The Karate Kid 2 (1986)
In the sequel, Daniel picks up with a Japanese girl, Kumiko, which makes sense in light of his being mentored by Mr. Miyagi. They also make a better couple too, partially because the girl is humble, pure-minded, family oriented, and not encumbered by feminist indoctrination. This allows Daniel’s heart to come out in a more authentic manner. (Red Pill readers should notice all the IOIs she sends to Daniel in the video below, and also how Daniel’s eyes light up in a way they didn’t with Ali before.) These days, W/LM-AF pairings are generally scorned, which in retrospect, kinda confirms the films’ Red Pill status.
The Last American Virgin (1982)
No discussion of this is complete without discussion of The Last American Virgin, which was the most Red Pill movie of the 1980s. That’s if you don’t count the sex comedy movies like Porky’s and the like, which weren’t really Pill movies — they were self parodying gaffes in which the directors poked fun at common icons of non-masculinity, and essentially said, “if you want to be a decent guy, don’t f***ing act like these guys”.
The thing is, although Red Pill wisdom was to be found here and there, it was far from young men’s consciousness as being the norm. Even when it appeared, it was not well explained, and was generally assessed as a problem specific only to losers — not as the norm.
Blue Pill mentality has always had the arrogant notion that the man can pick and choose whatever woman he likes, and it’s just a matter of convincing the girl of his “undying love and devotion”. In fact, nothing could be further from the truth. Men of this mindset have absolutely zero women knocking on their doors at 2 a.m.
And yet, we arrogantly believed that all would be well.
This naïve arrogance shows up most frequently when men rate women on the 1 to 10 scale. Although this in itself is not naïve nor arrogant, it’s just a short hand way of communicating a woman’s relative SMV. However, it invariably shows up as a Beta mindset of pedestalizing women, and is somewhat juvenile too. I don’t know where this comes from, but I’ll guess that maybe watching too much p0rn amplifies this metacognition.
From a practical standpoint and also in accordance to Scott’s Axiom, women do the choosing. Men and women would be infinitely better off by following the Volitional Model of Cascade Courtship (2021-11-15). Instead of discussing attraction ratings, men should be discussing how women display IOIs and to whom, and why, how their honey craft skills make them feel, shared values, and overall how well a particular woman fits into a certain man’s systemic world view. These are things that translate directly into real relationship potential.
- Σ Frame: Things men found attractive 50 years ago are still attractive today (2020-03-25)
- Σ Frame: The Demise of the Christian Life Script (2021-03-10)