50 Female Evasion and Control Tactics

Know thine adversary!

Readership: Men
Author’s Note:
This post had input from Jack, Deti, and RedPillApostle.
Length: 500 words
Reading Time: 2 minutes

“The courage of a man lies in commanding, a woman’s lies in obeying.”

Aristotle

Sometimes the truth on Σ Frame is freeing, joyful and funny.  Sometimes it hits close to home and hurts a little. This post could go either way, depending on the reader’s life experiences.

It is easy for men to think that women’s sexual authority is the only/primary “tool” most of them have, but this impression is because sex (or the lack thereof) is the “tool” that affects men the most acutely. As Scott once said“Men’s love language is sex”, so when that outlet is shut off, it hurts and feels like hate, especially when it is done as a vengeance.

Aside from sex, women have all sorts of tools that developed from sex and from their physically weaker nature. Here’s a list of their most common tools.

  1. Arguing for power/control, not to resolve the issue.
  2. Avoiding Commitment
  3. Backbiting
  4. Backchannel Communications
  5. Bait and Switch
  6. Bulverizing
  7. Carrot on a Stick — “If you do what I want/give me what I want, I might have sex with you.”
  8. Chivalry“Don’t hit me… I’m a girl”
  9. Claiming entitlement and special privileges — “Men need to man up!”
  10. Conniving
  11. Conspiracy
  12. Damseling — Contrived emotional ploys for sympathy, e.g. tears, AKA the “waterworks”
  13. Deception
  14. Demeaning your character in front of your friends and/or children.
  15. Displacement, e.g. throwing red herrings or changing the subject
  16. Duluth
  17. Duplicity
  18. Feigning Innocence or Ignorance — “I don’t know… It just happened!”
  19. Feminine Mystique — “I changed my mind.”; “Just because I felt like it.”
  20. Fraud
  21. Gaslighting
  22. Instigating Conflict — “Let’s you and him fight”
  23. Interrupting
  24. Machiavellianism
  25. Manipulation
  26. Mendacity, natural due to inherent solipsism
  27. Meretricious Charms
  28. Outright defiance as a challenge
  29. Partial compliance to give the appearance of compliance
  30. Passive Aggressiveness
  31. Plausible Deniability
  32. Pretending to be helpless
  33. Pretending to be devoid of any moral agency.
  34. Pretending to have moral superiority
  35. Psychological Projection
  36. Sabojacking (destroying any enterprise that isn’t done her way, or to her liking, and/or using this threat point to assume operative control of the enterprise)
  37. Sabotage (revenge)
  38. Saying things purely to hurt you
  39. Secrecy
  40. Shifting Responsibility
  41. Slander
  42. Solipsistic Fluidity of Truth
  43. Steamrolling — “It’s easier to get forgiveness than it is to get permission.”
  44. Subterfuge
  45. Subversion
  46. Talking Sh!t, e.g. to get attention, to be obnoxious, to buy time while wasting yours, etc.
  47. The Blame Game
  48. The Shame Game
  49. Ultimatums
  50. Using your goodness and honor as a weak spot against you — “He’d never divorce me, so I can behave however I want!”

This list could stretch into the hundreds, as well as a list of correlating augmenters (e.g. accomplices, make up, cosmetic surgery, having two email addresses, two phone numbers, two online accounts, even two names). Secrecy is absolutely necessary to pull it off.

The Solipsistic Hamster (AKA Psychological Dissociation) and various other Psychological defense mechanisms must be routinely employed to keep themselves together in this state of madness.

Related

About Jack

Jack is a world traveling artist, skilled in trading ideas and information, none of which are considered too holy, too nerdy, nor too profane to hijack and twist into useful fashion. Sigma Frame Mindsets and methods for building and maintaining a masculine Frame
This entry was posted in Boundaries, Choosing a Partner or Spouse, Collective Strength, Conflict Management, Conspiracy Theories, Courtship and Marriage, Discerning Lies and Deception, Disorders, Female Power, Feminism, Game Theory, Hamsterbation, Models of Failure, Psychology, Relationships, Secrecy, Solipsism, Strategy, Vetting Women. Bookmark the permalink.

59 Responses to 50 Female Evasion and Control Tactics

  1. thedeti says:

    50 ways to leave your lover.

    Like

  2. Red Pill Apostle says:

    1, 7, 9, 18, 19, 21, 23, 28, 29, 30, 33, 34, 38, 40, 49, 50.

    Areas of expertise I never wanted to have.

    Also these serve as proof that God does work, a woman can change and that part of the change is under a husband’s control. The part we as men control is moving ourselves towards the biblical patriarchal masculinity God intended, regardless of whether she is happy about it and without concern over how she’ll react to you changing the marriage dynamic.

    I decided to change myself and then did. (It’s a lot of effort, but worth it.) Mrs. Apostle had the option to follow along or not. She ultimately chose to follow along and since the end of the summer we’ve had what I envisioned marriage would be like. There are still the occasional tiffs or disagreements, but they are often quickly resolved, and on the whole, marriage has been quite good.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. thedeti says:

    #40. Shifting Responsibility.

    Hypoagency. Never taking responsibility. Always blaming someone or something else for her problems/issues/predicaments/situations. No matter what happened, it’s always someone else’s fault. Whatever “it” is, “it” never happened because of her actions or decisions. No, it’s because someone else didn’t do/say/decide what they were supposed to.

    Watch some of Kevin Samuels’ videos. The women who call in to his show have to be seen to be believed. Whenever they are asked about their trainwreck marriages or their divorces, they never, and I mean never, take any responsibility for the problems in their marriages or their divorces.

    Try this with any woman when you ask her about why she’s in a crappy marriage, why her past relationships ended, or why she’s divorced. The relationship ended because “he was/did/didn’t” something or other. She absolutely will not, refuses to, consider that maybe she played a part in the relationships’ demise, other than maybe “I wasn’t assertive enough” or “I had low self esteem” or “I wasn’t true to myself” or (my favorite):

    “I picked a drug dealer/criminal/sh!tbag who told me he reformed and he was so nice to me and wasn’t a sh!tbag to me but then I got pregnant and I needed him to work but he wouldn’t and then life got kind of rough and some difficult things started happening and we didn’t have any money then he turned back into a drug dealer/criminal/sh!tbag and now he’s on the streets/locked up again/ghosted and then I found out he was cheating on me and oh yeah he smacked me around once but I forgave him because man could he lay that pipe and blow my back out….”

    “I mean, like, um, he TOLD me he loved me and stuff! And, like, he said he wasn’t doing that bad stuff no more! I mean, how was I supposed to know all this was gonna happen?!”

    “He was abusive.” (My absolute favorite and the mainstay of female hamstering. I could do a whole post just on this.)

    “He was beta.”

    “He was irresponsible.”

    “He cheated.”

    “He was mean to me.”

    “He wouldn’t work or support me.”

    “He didn’t want kids.”

    “He was a terrible father.”

    “He yelled at me.”

    “He needed to grow up/become an adult/man up.”

    “He needed to find himself.” (Only women talk like this psychobabble BS. Even CHILDREN don’t say things like this.)

    “He wouldn’t be the man I needed him to be.”

    Women don’t take responsibility for their predicaments or their relationship problems. IF they don’t have a relationship or they can’t keep one or they keep ending, it is always the men’s fault. If they have lackluster dissatisfying marriages, it’s always their husbands’ fault. If they’re divorced, it’s always their ex husbands’ fault.

    Like

    • thedeti says:

      Women’s favorite “pseudo accountabilities”:

      “I had low self esteem/didn’t love myself.”
      “I wasn’t being true to myself.”
      “I needed to go find myself/didn’t know who I am.”
      “I was in a dark place in my life.”
      “I didn’t have good boundaries/was a doormat.”
      “I took bad advice from religious women who told me to submit and be a good wife.”
      “He wasn’t “emotionally available.”

      Like

    • thedeti says:

      #18. Feigning Innocence or Ignorance — “I don’t know… It just happened!” (Especially with sex.)

      –“I mean, I was just standing there minding my own business, and all of a sudden, this really really hot guy just sauntered up to me and started having sex with me!!”

      –“We were talking, and drinking, and drinking, and talking, and…. what happened happened… I mean, he had sex with me!”

      It’s never “I decided to have sex” or “we had sex”. She always paints herself as the “innocent bystander”. She is never the actor, always the “acted upon”. Never the decider; always the hapless duped drone, allegedly tricked and swindled into sex.

      Like

      • feeriker says:

        I’m waiting for “I was just minding my own business one day when this d!ck crept up on me from out of nowhere and just impaled me! Then I saw that it had a hawt tattooed Hell’s Angel attached to it, like it was dragging him along with it against his will, so I figured it wasn’t his fault, and it felt really good, so I just went with it.”

        Seriously, I expect any day now to hear this from some woman and have everyone around her believe it without question. This is what’s normal in the bizarro world we now live in.

        Liked by 2 people

      • Jack says:

        Feeriker, creeping d!cks are everywhere!

        Unfortunately, creeping coital predators have become commonplace. Just yesterday morning, I was attacked by a muliebrous pudendum that slowly glissaded up and down my middle leg as I was sleeping. At first, I was unaware of it gliding along the family jewels because it was lubricated with mucus and covered with epithelial cilia. But soon, succeeding waves of ventral muscular contractions within its orifice evacuated my life force and left me panting and out of breath. Unfortunately, it was attached to a exhausted woman with halitosis, so I just rolled it over and poked it a few times before wiping up the snail trail.

        Liked by 2 people

      • info says:

        She slipped, she tripped. And ended up impaled.

        Liked by 1 person

    • anonymous_ng says:

      John Ross wrote in his column Ross in Range to never date a divorced woman because if you meet her ex, you’ll find out he’s a pretty normal guy, in which case, she blew up their marriage over her own craziness, or he’s football bat crazy in which case, she has poor decision making skills, in neither case do you want to date her.

      Now, I’m sure there are exceptions, but honestly, how hard do you want to look to find her?

      Like

    • Red Pill Apostle says:

      There was a conversation months ago with Mrs. Apostle that I remember well and was a moment of foundational understanding for her as my wife. We were discussing agency regarding a divorced woman we know and she was on a jag about how the husband had behaved poorly so the wife did too. When I brought up whether the wife had agency or not, the implications that the wife either had control of herself and her choices or was unable to choose for herself and was under the husband’s directive did not sit well with Mrs. Apostle. I flipped the idea then to every time she justifies her actions with “yes, but you….” statements she’s admitting she doesn’t have control over herself, much like a child, and the lightbulb went on.

      Fast forward a few months and I have not heard that justification since. She has told me that when I behave or communicate in a certain manner it makes it harder for her, which is a legitimate statement. I can then work on my approach and delivery to make her compliance easier, which I see as part of living in knowledge of my wife as the weaker sex (1 Peter 3:7).

      Liked by 3 people

      • Oscar says:

        Wife: Stop treating me like a child!

        Husband: Stop acting like one!

        Liked by 2 people

      • Red Pill Apostle says:

        You’ll appreciate this Oscar. Last week Mrs. Apostle and I had a disagreement. The way I spoke to her took on the tone of a father to a child in some ways. My point was clear and she understood it, but would not admit to it and went through some of the 50 tactics listed. I confirmed that she understood my point and then purposely acted like she didn’t. Her reply was that she recognized the irony, but that she felt my tone was demeaning because it was like I was talking to a child and that’s why she acted child-like.

        “Most responsible teenager in the house” status confirmed.

        Liked by 1 person

    • feeriker says:

      “Try this with any woman when you ask her about why she’s in a crappy marriage, why her past relationships ended, or why she’s divorced. The relationship ended because “he was/did/didn’t” something or other. She absolutely will not, refuses to, consider that maybe she played a part in the relationships’ demise, other than maybe “I wasn’t assertive enough” or “I had low self esteem” or “I wasn’t true to myself”…”

      As the saying goes, “The one common element in all of your failed relationships is YOU!”

      Liked by 1 person

      • Oscar says:

        My 11-year-old boy and I hopped in the car and drove to the store. Focus on the Family just happened to be on the radio. The guest was a man who was talking about the importance of fathers repenting, and apologizing to their children for their sins.

        Fair enough. I think he’s right as far as that goes.

        The guest’s father had been a physically abusive drunk who never never had a kind word for his son.

        I could tell my boy was paying attention, so I told my boy:

        “Have you noticed how they’re focusing exclusively on the father? It’s true that the father was an abusive drunk. He was a complete dirt bag. There’s no excuse for him.

        But, what about the mother?

        The first thing a mother does for her children is choose their father. She chose an abusive drunk, made at least one child with him, then subjected that boy to decades of abuse. Where’s her accountability?”

        “When you date a woman, and she whines about what a jerk her ex-boyfriend was, ask her; “Why’d you choose him?” Her answer may reveal a lot about her character.”

        Liked by 2 people

    • feeriker says:

      “Women don’t take responsibility for their predicaments or their relationship problems.”

      You really could’ve ended that first sentence after the fourth word. With that truth in mind, reflect for a few moments on the extent to which the sex that is structurally incapable of taking responsibility or allowing itself to be held accountable now holds positions of REAL economic and political power around the globe. Truly the stuff of which the most horrifying nightmares are made.

      Liked by 1 person

    • zeonicfreak says:

      My brother recently has officially married a woman who has 3 kids, who is more than 10 years older than him, and has been married twice (with her second ex in prison of all places). My parents have warned him not to get involved with her, but he did and they decided to get married after being together for a year and a half. I’m not going into the detail of how weird it all is right now, but I wouldn’t be surprised if they get to a crossroads where they consider divorce, because she’s bound to do something to my brother that would make him give it up. I don’t want that to happen, but we shall see.

      I’ve been doing online dating this year and my last date was with a woman off Match.com who I found attractive off the bat and who reached out to me. We went on one date and getting to talk to her more I already saw some red flags waving. She’s been married twice (is how I understand it) and the last guy just “up and left and went crazy” or something, leaving her with two young children. She says she’s a believer but im not sure how deep that is. She pursuing being a life coach for people when to me, I know most of her issues aren’t solved. She’s lived an interesting life with a number of tattoos on her, not sure what her natural hair color is, and has that “free spirit” feminist attitude. She told me a couple of weeks later that things were taking off for her and that she needs to put off dating. So either I take that as I wasn’t the guy for her based off first impressions, or there was another guy that came along after the date that gave her tingles, who really knows. All I know is I dodged that bullet, ill be surprised if she reaches out to me.

      Like

      • Oscar says:

        “My brother recently has officially married a woman who has 3 kids, who is more than 10 years older than him, and has been married twice (with her second ex in prison of all places).”

        Did your brother set out to intentionally pack as many red flags into one relationship as possible?

        “I’ve been doing online dating this year and my last date was with a woman off Match.com who I found attractive off the bat and who reached out to me. We went on one date and getting to talk to her more I already saw some red flags waving. She’s been married twice (is how I understand it) and the last guy just “up and left and went crazy” or something, leaving her with two young children. She says she’s a believer but I’m not sure how deep that is. She pursuing being a life coach for people when to me, I know most of her issues aren’t solved. She’s lived an interesting life with a number of tattoos on her, not sure what her natural hair color is, and has that “free spirit” feminist attitude.”

        I see it’s not just your brother. By the way, when she said that “the last guy just ‘up and left and went crazy'”, that’s pretty much the kind of response that reveals her character.

        Like

      • feeriker says:

        “She pursuing being a life coach…”

        RUN, FORREST! RUN!

        “All I know is I dodged that bullet, ill be surprised if she reaches out to me.”

        You sure did. Pray that she doesn’t contact you again. Nothing good will come of trying to restart something. Trust me on that.

        Like

      • Jack says:

        ZeonicFreak,

        “She told me a couple of weeks later that things were taking off for her and that she needs to put off dating. So either I take that as I wasn’t the guy for her based off first impressions, or there was another guy that came along after the date that gave her tingles… Who really knows?”

        Having a series of short term relationships is the “default setting” for the average woman on the carousel. This woman’s words and behavior fits this typology perfectly.

        In my past experience, I’ve known a couple women who were absolutely loony-tunes crazy about me. Nevertheless, after several dates they suddenly disappeared off the face of the earth, with no explanation, no call, no message, nothing… What happened? I can only guess that they found another guy who made them loony-tunes crazy and they totally forgot about me. You see, these women want to be loony-tunes crazy more than they want to develop a relationship with a man. In the Manosphere, we call this behavior “chasing the Tingles”. Physiologically, it’s a dopamine rush and it is addictive.

        Estimates for the time frame of this type of relationship range from 2 weeks to 2 years max, with the mode at around 2 months, and a sharp drop between 6-8 months. You made it to the 2 week marker, which means you were truly a “thing” for her (for those two weeks), and she gave you the courtesy of cutting things off decisively. That’s better than most guys can do these days. Chalk it up to experience. You’re making progress.

        Like

      • zeonicfreak says:

        @Oscar,

        My brother has always been able to get girls to chase after him, and I’ve been the exact opposite. This one did the same, had a personality he really liked (in ways they’re both made for each other), and based on how she treats him with gifts, she seems she really cares. But the girls that he’s been with have been crazy to some degree and have had some kind of influence on him and his decisions which reflects in his attitudes, which is once again happening. He’s been called out by a pastor for being “double minded all his life”, and my mom and I were nodding in the pews like bobble heads in agreement, to the point it was almost comical. All I can do is pray for the best course for him, regardless if the marriage continues or ends.

        Yea, I don’t get how a guy can ditch two children with a woman he was with just because he decided to do it one day. This girl acted like nothing was her fault while in the back of my mind I’m going, “I’m only getting one side of this story.”

        I’ve met and talked to other women on match who have reached out to me. One girl wanted to do a video chat and we talked for two hours. Then she started asking me about what I think of her body. I knew she was a very plump girl and she said to be honest with her, so my response was, “Well, during this whole video I’ve only been able to see above your neck line, so how do I know what the rest of you looks like?” Then I gave her the honest answer. I figured I offended her and that would be that. But the next day she’s messaging me saying she wants to continue, because “I feel like you really like me from our conversation.” Nipped that in the bud real quick and told her that’s not how I felt in a polite manner and that was that.

        @feeriker,

        I doubt she’s going to reach out to me, and I’m perfectly fine with that.

        @Jack,

        I’ve always had that happen to me in my teen years, where I wanted to talk to a girl and then she ghosted me after a while. And in some cases you never see them again. That’s always affected me because I keep thinking, “If I want to get involved with another girl, is the same thing going to happen to me again? And if this is the case, then what is wrong with me that made her just ghost me?” I’ve had to get over that in the past few years and not take it personal.

        There’s one girl I met at a fan con I go to every year (pre covid). We started chatting in the arcade room and we were texting every day after the con ended since I really felt like we had a connection. After about two weeks in, she ghosted me, and ignored my texts. I thought it better not to obsess about it and decided to let it go. That was two years ago. I’m not sure what progress you mean unless its progress in understanding how crazy women are in this area.

        Like

      • Jack says:

        ZeonicFreak,

        “I’m not sure what progress you mean unless its progress in understanding how crazy women are in this area.”

        Progress means that you’re getting experience in talking with and interacting with people in general, and women specifically, no matter how good or bad it turns out. In other words, things are happening. If nothing was happening, you would have no chance to try yourself out, feel the situation, learn, and improve. Remember what I wrote in Start Small to Build Internal Locus of Control? The important thing is for you to figure out how to handle your emotions and be satisfied with your own performance, and it sounds like you did this.

        Like

      • zeonicfreak says:

        @Jack,

        “Progress means that you’re getting experience in talking with and interacting with people in general, and women specifically, no matter how good or bad it turns out. In other words, things are happening. If nothing was happening, you would have no chance to try yourself out, feel the situation, learn, and improve.”

        Not sure If I got around to reading that article yet. I will say I take everything as a learning experience. It’s more about the learning experience than always getting the result you desire. I guess its a subconscious thing for me. Taking in account and evaluating my experiences is something I do often, and asking God what to do with the data in terms of how He wants me to see it and learn from it.

        “The important thing is for you to figure out how to handle your emotions and be satisfied with your own performance, and it sounds like you did this.”

        Thank you!

        Liked by 1 person

  4. Femmy says:

    I’m trying to figure this out, but it’s difficult.
    Perhaps I’m blind to it.

    From a blinded point view, it’s been this way all my life since a child.

    I always saw myself as a receiver.
    Of life.

    And fighting off what gave me pain.

    Fighting things that ‘happened to me.’

    It wasn’t until recently, when you guys, others, and guys like Kevin Samuels, that I looked back to what ‘happened to me’ has caused me to create decisions. And that I had to take responsibility for creating those decisions, regardless of what ‘happened to me’.

    When that point came to my understanding, it was a new idea.

    So I see now that I made decisions based on avoiding pain.

    And.

    The cause of the pain, was the ‘reason’.

    I never saw it as ‘my fault’.

    The decisions were based on avoiding pain and suffering.

    But perhaps that was just my sensitive nature and not every woman’s experience?

    So reading that list just makes me see how differently you and I think.

    In MY life history, they are not tactics of Conscious control of the man. That list just ‘happens automatically’ depending on the ‘attacks’ on my ability to handle the suffering from outside of me.

    I hope that makes sense.

    It’s blind and automatic.

    Until someone points it out.

    It could be just me, I don’t know.

    I wasn’t taught to make decisions growing up.

    I was taught to submit and accept everything. But I couldn’t. I always blamed the cause til now.

    Liked by 1 person

    • thedeti says:

      Thanks for your reply.

      1) This is also a result of men’s instinctive and knee jerk protection of women. Men reflexively think and act to protect women and shield them from adverse consequences — even those adverse consequences women bring on themselves. As I was reading your response I had to consciously combat my instinct to do the remote/internet version of patting you on the head and going “There there Femmy, it’s going to be OK, no one blames you, it’s not your fault”. I had to fight my instinct to excuse, explain, and otherwise not hold you accountable for your decisions.

      2) Men who hold women accountable for women’s own decisions are derided as mean spirited, cruel, and heartless — even when that holding accountable is nothing more than allowing natural consequences to occur. This is widespread and pervasive — even other men will deride and denigrate imposition of adverse consequences on women.

      3) I don’t think everything women do is out of malice or spite. Some things are.

      4) I do think that the “it just happened” thing women do is an attempt to invoke male protection, even from total strangers. Women instinctively know to damsel it up specifically to exploit this universal male trait. I really think this is hardwired in women specifically to keep more women alive. The alternative is that men would allow natural consequences to befall women — either impose the same punishment on women that would be imposed on men (death, kicked out of the tribe) or natural consequences (illness, isolation, incapacitation, death).

      5) Women do this to men they’re dating or men they’re sexually involved with, specifically to get their “payment” in the form of protection and priovision. Women believe they’re entitled to “get something” from men in return for the sex they have with those men. In part, women expect “payment” in the form of protection, including relief from the natural consequences of their actions and excusal from responsibility. “I have sex with you, so you’re supposed to protect me from everything, including my own negligence and recklessness.”

      Liked by 1 person

    • thedeti says:

      “It wasn’t until recently, when you guys, others, and guys like Kevin Samuels, that I looked back to what ‘happened to me’ has caused me to create decisions. And that I had to take responsibility for creating those decisions, regardless of what ‘happened to me ‘.”

      “So I see now that I made decisions based on avoiding pain. The cause of the pain , was the ‘ reason’ . I never saw it as ‘my fault. The decisions were based on avoiding pain and suffering.”

      You also expected that men should not point out or emphasize your responsibility because doing so would increase your pain and suffering. You also expected that men should do things to alleviate that pain. You also expected that men should not do things so as not to exacerbate that pain. So, while you might not have intended to control men; your actions likely had that effect. They often took the form of…

      “…you can’t say bad stuff about what ‘happened to me’ because that’s mean and hurtful. Don’t impose consequences on me, because that’s painful and I’m trying to avoid pain here. Don’t let those consequences happen because that would be painful and it’s your job to make sure they don’t happen. If you do let them happen, you’re mean and hurtful and cruel. Plus, if they happen I might get incapacitated or killed and that’s one less vagina for sex and one less womb for reproduction.”

      You didn’t say those things, but you likely acted in manners consistent with them, and men realized them as well.

      Like

  5. feeriker says:

    “Plus, if [consequences] happen I might get incapacitated or killed and that’s one less vagina for sex and one less womb for reproduction.”

    [Red-pilled] Man’s response: “Since you’re not my girlfriend, my wife, or in any way sexually involved with me, nor do you intend to be, that vagina for sex, and that womb for reproduction, or whatever fate befalls either one of them, is absolutely NONE of my concern.”

    Liked by 4 people

    • Red Pill Apostle says:

      feeriker – What you wrote sounds calloused until you consider that there has to be a way to differentiate who you should be concerned about and who someone else should be concerned about. Take the Bible’s instructions to care for widows. Are we to care for all of them or just the ones we go to church with? It gets out of hand quickly.

      My wife and I had this discussion last night after a single female acquaintance put out a request for help moving furniture. She asked me why I declined and the reason is that she’s not “our people”, or “tribe” as Deti put it. If someone in our group needs help, we’re changing plans to help them and they’d do the same for us. There has to be a line somewhere, and for us, it’s “our people”.

      Liked by 1 person

      • catacombresident says:

        “Know your tribe” is actually a biblical teaching.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Oscar says:

        “Take the Bible’s instructions to care for widows. Are we to care for all of them or just the ones we go to church with? It gets out of hand quickly.”

        Let’s look at what the Bible actually says about caring for widows.

        1 Timothy 5
        3 Honor widows who are really widows. 4 But if any widow has children or grandchildren, let them first learn to show piety at home and to repay their parents; for this is good and acceptable before God. 5 Now she who is really a widow, and left alone, trusts in God and continues in supplications and prayers night and day. 6 But she who lives in pleasure is dead while she lives. 7 And these things command, that they may be blameless. 8 But if anyone does not provide for his own, and especially for those of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
        9 Do not let a widow under sixty years old be taken into the number, and not unless she has been the wife of one man, 10 well reported for good works: if she has brought up children, if she has lodged strangers, if she has washed the saints’ feet, if she has relieved the afflicted, if she has diligently followed every good work.
        11 But refuse the younger widows; for when they have begun to grow wanton against Christ, they desire to marry, 12 having condemnation because they have cast off their first faith. 13 And besides they learn to be idle, wandering about from house to house, and not only idle but also gossips and busybodies, saying things which they ought not. 14 Therefore I desire that the younger widows marry, bear children, manage the house, give no opportunity to the adversary to speak reproachfully. 15 For some have already turned aside after Satan. 16 If any believing man or woman has widows, let them relieve them, and do not let the church be burdened, that it may relieve those who are really widows.

        Look at all the qualifications a widow has to meet before she can be considered for assistance.

        She has to be at least 60, left alone, a devout believer, a servant of the saints, wife to only one husband, etc.

        In Numbers 18:32, God commands the Levites, “You shall not profane the holy gifts of the children of Israel, lest you die.” Enabling irresponsible people with offerings donated to the church is one way to “profane the holy gifts”.

        Like

  6. RichardP says:

    “Take the Bible’s instructions to care for widows. Are we to care for all of them or just the ones we go to church with?”

    Keep in mind that those words were not written to us. They were written to those who were alive when those words were written. They were written from the considerations of the day. Therefore, we, in the now, must think beyond the words written then in a way that those alive then did not have to. This is true of much that is written in the Bible.

    The writer of those words may in fact have meant, “all widows within your orbit, not just the one’s you go to church with”. Why? Because small. Most of the villages that folks lived in when those words were written were not very large. Not too hard to believe that everyone in the village knew everyone else. Even Jerusalem then was not large, as it is now. But, when you live in Los Angeles, or Chicago, etc., “care for the widows” must be interpreted with the intelligence God gave us. Surely the writer of those words had no concept of a city the size of Los Angeles, etc. Otherwise, his words would have been constrained to something like “do what you can do, with the resources that God has given you.”

    This is true of many other commandments in the Bible. All any of us can ever do is what we can do with the resources that God has given us. And God gives each of us the resources he wants us to have. Which means we don’t all have the same resources from God and so our behaviors are not all going to be the same, or have the same results.

    At this point, we are bumping up against the point made a few threads back about acting out in the faith you have, as a nose or toe or eye, etc. in the body of Christ. The thread that talked about eating meat offered to idols — some thought God said it was OK, others thought He hadn’t said that, and God honoring the faith of both.

    [Jack: Links added for the reader’s reference.]

    Like

    • Jack says:

      Each man has been granted a domain of authority and influence by God, and each man should come to a full awareness of where those boundaries are, whether he has the responsibility to help someone or not. If he does, then he should be pulling out all stops to do so, and if he doesn’t, then he shouldn’t allow himself to get sucked into it, nor should he feel guilty about it if he does not.

      A man should NOT just help others whenever he sees an opportunity to act in the ego affirming position of a benefactor, or is feeling generous or guilty or horny or whatever, or simply has the mind or mood to do so, but this is what we typically see. If he really cares, he might go to the trouble to see that the person in authority over the person in need is aware of the situation, but then once that awareness is established, he needs to trust that the situation will then be resolved and walk away. In the rare case when the person in need has no cover of authority over them, a man might assume that place, but then this would have to be firmly understood and established before dispensing help. It should reflect a covenant authority, and not just be a one-off thing.

      Like

  7. locustsplease says:

    Most women are just sitting at #50. (Using your goodness and honor as a weak spot against you.) And then think when they switch between any tactic #49–#1 it makes them great people.

    My mother cycles through abuse tactics and it is fascinating to watch. She will start a conversation about something and by the end she will be arguing against you and the thing she started talking about! Should not be allowed to vote, IMHO. She only controls her behavior so you keep coming around, and if you would keep coming around then she would be totally ruthless.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Jack says:

    While I was compiling this list, it became apparent that many of these tactics come from uniquely different and contradictory psychological states, what the Bible calls “double mindedness” (c.f. James 1:5-8). For example, 33 and 34 are especially prevalent and insidious.

    33. Pretending to be devoid of any moral agency.
    34. Pretending to have moral superiority.

    How the ħɘ11 can one exhibit a paucity of moral agency, and still maintain a positional claim of moral superiority? Such hypocrisy is a mark of madness.

    Like

    • Femmy says:

      Is this true of all women of all time?
      If it is, we’re all Jezebellions

      and Evonians .

      All of us.

      No exceptions.

      Perhaps that is why Turtullian didn’t believe in giving woman freedoms.

      And why women today are showing you who they really are.

      Why did men allow women to vote??? I don’t get it.

      Liked by 1 person

      • info says:

        @Femmy,

        Lets say a lot of evil Men and Women who have power really believed in equality and in subverting the West with the Inversion of Sex roles.

        Those who opposed this, both Men and Women back in the day, simply didn’t have the political skill and power to oppose those people pushing it through.

        Like

  9. Femmy says:

    Thank you, info.

    Jack, I was reading Radix’s book, “Expectations, Hopes and Dreams.”

    Liked by 1 person

  10. RayRay says:

    The more time I spend on blogs like this and platforms that discuss women’s nature, the less I want to interact with them. I don’t know what relationships and marriages will be like in 20-30 years.

    Like

    • Jack says:

      “The more time I spend on blogs like this and platforms that discuss women’s nature, the less I want to interact with them.”

      It’s true. The truth is usually hard to accept. But it’s better than falling for the pretty lies and getting suckered into a poor quality marriage life of less-than-equal servitude. Hard as it may be to swallow the truth, you’ll be better prepared for marriage, and as a result, you’ll get less of the sh!t storms and more contentment and satisfaction out of it.

      As the British say, “Keep calm and carry on.” Allow God to surprise you with a wife that’s better than the average stuff you read here.

      Like

  11. feeriker says:

    “When you date a woman, and she whines about what a jerk her ex-boyfriend was, ask her; “Why’d you choose him?” Her answer may reveal a lot about her character.”

    Any red-pilled man should probably give serious consideration to just kicking such a woman to the curb as soon as he hears “jerk [or “abusive”] ex-boyfriend” come out of her mouth for the first time. Unless she dated him for a month or less and kicked him to the curb IMMEDIATELY upon his showing the first signs of dark triad behavior, she has demonstrated herself to be a drama queen and an emotionally immature and unstable woman who almost certainly has much deeper issues that will become toxic to a relationship. No man needs to attach himself to that.

    Like

  12. Femmy says:

    “We don’t take it personally when sinners sin against God, even if we are the proximate target.”

    ~ Quoted from Radix’s book, “Heart of ? Living”.

    Difficult for me. But I have to work on this.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. feeriker says:

    Wife: Stop treating me like a child!

    Husband: Stop acting like one!

    My next-door neighbor and his (common law) wife used to have some pretty loud (though never physically violent) arguments during the evening after they both had been socializing with “John Barleycorn.” (We all live on lots that are between one and one and a half acres in size, so if I could hear their arguments from my porch, the decibel level was significant.) One evening in the middle of one of their arguments the exact exchange quoted above took place. It apparently ended the argument on the spot, as she offered no rejoinder and there was dead silence from their property for the rest of the evening.

    I don’t think I had ever before heard the line “then stop acting [like a child]” have such immediate effect, and probably never will again.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Red Pill Apostle says:

      feeriker — I’ve used the line “You’re acting like a child” enough with Mrs. Apostle that she is beginning to recognize the behavior in herself on her own. It doesn’t stop the emotions from ruling the day at times (think hormonal cycles), but it is a big step forward from the past and the incidents where emotions rule the day are becoming less and less frequent. The other day I had a quiet moment where I thought, “Life is pretty good!”

      Like

      • feeriker says:

        It probably helps us put matters into perspective to remember that most women never mature mentally beyond the age of 16 or 17.

        Liked by 1 person

      • zeonicfreak says:

        My cousin once stated that when women hit 20 its like they revert to age zero and act like babies again. This explains a lot about the girls I saw in college when I was going in my mid 20’s to early 30’s. They really weren’t cute just annoying. I’ve known more girls in their senior years of high school that seem to be more well behaved than maybe half of those that go to college.

        Like

  14. Femmy says:

    Haha

    My sister and I tease each other that we’re still 14.

    Haha

    Like

    • Oscar says:

      I’ve heard it said that women stop maturing when they start getting attention from men, and don’t start maturing again until after their beauty starts to fade. I can’t say that’s definitely true, but I can’t say it’s false, either.

      Like

      • Jack says:

        Feeriker:

        “…most women never mature mentally beyond the age of 16 or 17.”

        ZeonicFreak:

        “…when women hit 20 its like they revert to age zero and act like babies again.”

        Oscar:

        “…women stop maturing when they start getting attention from men, and don’t start maturing again until after their beauty starts to fade.”

        I often refer to this regression as the c0ckamania stage. It’s when hypergamy kicks in and dominates their thinking. It usually happens a couple years after puberty.

        Something similar happens to men too, as Deti said:

        “P_ssy makes men stupid.”

        Similar to how men’s obsession with muff makes them stupid, sexual attention (and especially c0ck) pulls the pin on a woman’s love grenade, activates her hypergamic instincts, and makes her childish, conceited, vain, spiteful, and rude (AKA c0ckamania). For this reason, in Asia, it is considered somewhat immoral to give a teenage girl too much fawning attention, even from fathers. It’s “too much” when it makes her into a blushing silly simpleton. It’s like the first small step towards making her into a s1ut.

        In general, an appeal to desire brings out the worst of people, which is actually the true person deep inside. Part of knowing yourself and growing in maturity involves being familiar with this part of yourself, and learning how to handle it and take responsibility towards controlling the outcome. The problem nowadays is that women aren’t pushed to take responsibility for it, and most men don’t have the opportunity to experience it (at least not in a real relationship with a woman). This is also why a lot of people are not maturing.

        Like

  15. feeriker says:

    “They really weren’t cute just annoying.”

    If you want to see a young woman, especially one considered “cute” or “hawt” flip out, lose her sh!t and completely melt down, let her know that you find her annoying and immature instead of cute or beautiful.

    Liked by 1 person

    • anonymous_ng says:

      I have a friend who points out that super attractive women often hate/despise gay men because they aren’t influenced by the women’s sexual power.

      Like

      • feeriker says:

        My observation has been just the opposite. “Tens” like and often befriend gay men because 1) they’re not a sexual threat, and 2) they can either look down on them with impunity, or use them as allies in their war against men they’re not attracted to.

        Liked by 1 person

      • anonymous_ng says:

        True, I’ve seen the dynamic you’re talking about as well.

        It may be that his comment was specifically about women who used their looks to get ahead in a professional setting, it was many years ago.

        I can see both being true.

        Like

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