Women need attention like men need sex.
Readership: Men; Christian Men
Author’s Note: In this post, I’ve compiled text from several comments about how and why women value male attention.
Reader’s Note: This post offers a concise summary of an older topic that deserves highlighting.
Length: 2,100 words
Reading Time: 7 minutes
Women Crave Male Attention
Women, especially attractive young ones, don’t like to admit to a lot of the more unsavory truths about their behaviors and motives, often even to themselves really, but we can still discern what’s going on by observing what they do closely.
In addition to the fact that women never talk about the invidious aspects of their own nature, they are also rather skilled in hiding these things as well. As a result, it’s somewhat easy for men to miss the fundamental features of women’s nature, but it’s there.
Once you learn to look for it, it’s pretty unmistakable that one of these fundamental features is that women want attention. It stimulates dopamine in the female hindbrain much like sex does for men. Women absolutely crave it, like men crave the sexual act.
In addition, male attention is a form of social currency for attractive women.
For example, a woman may not be attracted at all to the cop who pulls her over for a speeding ticket, but she hopes she is attractive enough to him to be able to charm her way out of a ticket by some light, non-obvious flirting — even if the guy is repulsive to her physically.
Rollo refers to “attention” and “affirmation”, as the most powerful currencies in female social conventions.
In this short video, Rollo goes over the phases of the female life span.
Note that during a woman’s peak SMV years, the attention flows non-stop, followed by 50+ years of very little attention or none at all.
May I have your attention?!?
Women place value on attention from anyone, especially attractive men, but also from unattractive men. Just like men will seldom turn down sex with any woman, women will hardly ever refuse attention from any man. Women will go out of their way to make themselves be attractive to men that they aren’t attracted to. It’s useful because her attractiveness draws the much coveted attention from men.
Of course if she’s around an attractive man who’s pushing the buttons, she will get aroused, but it’s not necessary for a woman to have sex to get aroused by the attention. Women are known to dangle the hope of sex in front of a man, like a carrot on a stick, merely to attract men’s attention to themselves, and for no other purpose. Most men fail to get this memo, and chase after flirty women thinking that she has at least somewhat serious intentions behind her interest. But seldom is this the case. If a woman has to have sex with a man to get and keep his attention (or money, or whatever else she wants from that man), she’ll do it – even if she’s not sexually aroused, but this tends to be a last resort when she’s desperate for attention and no better options are presented.
It’s like this. When an attractive woman enters a bar, she enjoys feeling all the male eyes check her out through her peripheral vision. She can feel the weight of their stares, and it’s exhilarating to her. She likes being in command of that tantalizing desire for her. She likes that they admire her – even the guys she wouldn’t give the time of day to. She likes that she is considered hot in general, as long as the guys who are unattractive stay in their “cages” and do not approach or do anything like that to annoy her. She wants to soak in the attention with a minimum of discomfiture, which entails that attention from men who are not attractive to them is expressed in a way that is only beneficial to the woman and is never threatening or demanding of her. The Objectification of Reproductive Potential must deliver an Ego Rush or else it is Chauvinistic.
In general, men will not voluntarily interact with a woman who does not generate sexual interest. Whenever men are interacting with a woman, they’re always thinking of the next step, or the next phase of the relationship leading towards sex and sanctification. Women don’t think that far. They already got what they wanted from that brief interaction — Attention.
This is why women love to keep a large number of Beta orbiters in the Friend Zone – men whom they have absolutely no interest in romantically. It’s for the attention and affirmation. That’s what they want out of the relationship, and since much alone this gives them what they want, there is no motivation for them to invest anything more into the relationship.
Now, of course, they likely would never admit to any of that, but that’s another story.
Attention feeds the feral feminine appetites for Envy and Drama
Even between women, garnering attention is one of the ways that women compare themselves to each other on the female “leaderboards”, if you will, contributing to the determination of who is the Queen Bee. The Queen Bee always turns out to be the woman who can keep herself stoked high on a dopamine fueled ego rush via various vectors. But all of these vectors are based on women’s overall level of attractiveness/ability to turn heads “in general” (not just Ryan Reynolds’ head), her social skills in navigating those waters, and maintaining her own ego as supreme.
One significant way that women compare themselves to each other nowadays is “likes” on social media, especially for pictures. This activity also taps into the dopamine rush, and when coupled with attention, it is a double hit.
They all know that most of those likes are from men who are “creepy” in the sense that they would not give these guys the time of day either online or offline … but they still want the dopamine surge from getting likes. They want the guys to be attracted to them, it feeds them, it empowers them in competition with each other (“who is the fairest of them all”), and it’s a currency they deploy with men when necessary or useful.
In general, men despise the insatiable female appetite for envy and drama, so smart women have to know how to capitalize on their own hunger for attention without trampling on toes.
Case Study – Acid Attacks
Once in a while, we’ll hear reports of acid attacks* in other parts of the world, usually from India and Pakistan. Westerners tend to be confused about the overall purpose of this egregious aggression which forever mars feminine beauty. But Indians clearly recognize this as a clumsy but very effective attempt** to eliminate the envy and drama (and in some cases, extra-marital affairs) arising from women’s addiction to attention. It’s a strike at the core of a woman’s human value, which nips not just the bud, but the root itself.
* If you do a search for this online, be prepared for some gruesome images.
** It’s also done in revenge by jilted lovers and by husbands who are dissatisfied with the wife’s dowry. Of course, I condemn such actions.
OASIS Scratches the Itch
NovaSeeker spearheaded an investigation of Online Amateur Sex Industry and Socialization (OASIS, e.g. OnlyFans) back in January and February. More recently, Rollo has started to focus on the OnlyFans phenomenon too.
It’s not hard to understand why more and more girls are turning to sugaring. They get attention. Even better, they get paid to get attention. It’s prostitution for all intents and purposes, but they really don’t care and they don’t have any kind of moral problem with this at all.
There are social factors pushing women into OASIS too. Men are waking up to the fact that the cards are stacked against them. So many women can’t get boyfriends to take them out and pay for their stuff. They can’t get men to bite the bullet and wife them up, at least not until she panics and he relents because he’s so hard up. So they turn to sugaring.
Hence the rise in online attention gathering and the increasing taboo-ization of in-person attention expressing by men. The internet is the ultimate “safe space” for women to accumulate the attention of unattractive men in a way that is undemanding and unthreatening (for the most part, cyber-stalking and so on aside), and so we see a virtual stampede of women into social media, copiously displaying their coons and reveling in the male attention.
It’s because women want attention, and they’ll get it any way they can. Just as men want sex, and they’ll get it any way they can.
Women still want real world attention more than online attention. But they want it from men their hindbrains consider a possibility for marriage (LTR). They don’t want it from men their hindbrains don’t consider suitable for marriage, thus, workplace harassment charges for micro-offenses. I’d say, based on observation, they want it from alphas and greater betas (top 20%). They don’t want it from lesser betas and deltas (middle 60%) nor gammas (bottom 20%). My guess is they don’t think much about gammas and lesser betas, one way or the other, looking at them online. As we say around the ‘sphere, they are invisible.
Online (monetized porn sites aside), they don’t know who’s looking at them. But similar to real life, they probably still prefer online attention from men their hindbrains consider a possibility for a satisfying hookup or marriage.
Hitting the Wall hits women where it hurts the most (No more Attention)
As women age, they attract less attention from men.
Women notice when men’s eyes, in general, stop following them around. Most of those eyes are the eyes of men that women couldn’t care less about, but they still notice when they stop getting noticed by them, and they care about it – deeply. They miss that attention when it dissipates. They do care, of course, much more about the attention of the attractive men, but the fact is that when they lose the “general attention”, they notice, and they do not like it.
Older women often say that the thing they miss MOST from their youth is being noticed by men. & Women aging into early middle age become wistful about how they became “invisible” to men — suddenly men who would previously be checking them out in grocery lines, on the subway, while jogging, would just look right past them or never look up from their phones or what have you. They like being “generally attractive”, even to men to whom they would not give even the time of day. and they are acutely aware of this slow attrition. They notice when it goes away, and they hate it.
Some women may not admit it openly, but most all women are acutely aware of it, and they do miss it when it’s gone, because it’s the before (attention when young) and after (attention when older) that they are comparing when it goes missing. For women who are quite pretty younger in life, it’s actually quite traumatic when they fall off the “general male radar screen” in that way. So they notice when men in general stop noticing, even though, when they are young, they take said noticing from unattractive men for granted.
Men crave female attention too, but seldom get it
Men desire attention from women in the form of humble, natural affection from women, not just sex. In fact, sex without the reciprocation of her natural affection is rather cold, empty, and unsatisfying. Men are attracted to women who are sufficiently comfortable in their vulnerability to display this kind of attention. It stimulates his ego, which is very important for his personal growth.
One of the greatest joys of a Meet Cute is when a man can watch a woman animate and feel her heart “light up” from his attention. In essence, she is returning his attention. But this usually only happens when the woman doesn’t get that much attention to begin with. Because modern western women are steeped in constant attention, waxed thick with effervescent moxies, few men can ever have this experience. Being emotionally jaded and spiritually defiled from the CC makes this a certainty.
In closing, I’ll offer this question as an interesting thought experiment:
Women receive ego affirmation from ANY attention from ANY man. Women can slap on some red lipstick and get attention. It’s that easy!
What would the world be like if men could get sex from women as easily as women get attention from men?!?
Just imagine if a man could paint his nose blue and every woman who sees it will immediately give him sex!!!
Imagine if a man paints his nose blue, takes a few selfies and posts them online, and he gets a thousand “likes”. Women are paying him cash to see photos of his blue nose. Women are knocking on his door to get that blue nose sniffing in their snatch.
It seems like an incredulous fantasy land, but yet that is what the world is like for young women!
It’s just too easy – when they’re young, that is.