Sexual competition continues after marriage

Married couples have a duty to remain the apple of the other’s eye.

Readership: Married couples;
Length: 3,000 words
Reading Time: 10 minutes

Attention is Womens’ Sexual Currency

Deti wrote,

“Women want attention. They absolutely crave it, like men crave the sexual act. If a woman has to have sex with a man to get and keep his attention (or money, or whatever else she wants from that man), she’ll do it even if she’s not sexually aroused. Of course if she’s around an attractive man who’s pushing the buttons, she will get aroused, but it’s not necessary for her to have sex.

This is a reason why more and more girls are turning to sugaring. They get attention. They get money. They can’t seem to get boyfriends to take them out and pay, so they turn to sugaring. They can’t seem to get men to bite the bullet and wife them up, at least not until she panics and he relents because he’s so hard up. So they turn to sugaring. They are prostitutes for all intents and purposes, but they really don’t care and don’t have any kind of moral problem with this at all.

It’s because women want attention, and they’ll get it any way they can. Just as men want sex, and they’ll get it any way they can.”

As NovaSeeker pointed out recently, ALL attention is sexual attention, and women’s drive for (sexual) attention is intense. Women have complex mechanisms to attract the attention that they need without giving the outward appearance of neediness. The next section will examine one such example.

Visual Shamelessness to the World

In a previous post, PW – When wanton treachery brings shame not honor (2020 October 14), I tackled the false claim that women’s bodies are something to be ashamed of. Mature women know inwardly (at some level) that men are visually oriented and are easily distracted by the feminine form, and that this causes men to focus on their fleshly desires and give the woman the attention she covets. (See Romans 8:5-8.) But some women make this claim that her body “is nothing to be ashamed of” or “I’m just being my sexy self”, so that they can be the centerpiece of (sexual) attention by showcasing their silhouettes of skin, while outwardly denying the fact that men are visually stimulated. It’s a self-defense measure — gaslighting in the form of Plausible Deniability. Womens’ underlying purpose of denying this reality is so that they can dress provocatively to attract mens’ attention and still avoid contingent responsibility for any unwanted consequences that might arise.

All this is just another take on how women hold predominant power and control over the mating market. But they run into a problem when they want to be taken seriously…

Women are Sexually Oriented

Looking at this from the other side of the aisle, women are enticed by a charismatic man who is good looking, and has power, status, athleticism, and money (PSALM). Just as men have a radar to detect the female form, women also have a sixth sense for scoping out men. Cameron did some introspection from this perspective.

“…I have some reservations about the Christian bodybuilding thing you see promoted on some Christian Manosphere sites.  When I used to lift weights and got fairly big, women definitely noticed, including Christian women.  One of [my] wife’s friends made an explicit remark [about my physique], and another Christian friend of hers told [my] wife how she wished her husband did the same thing.

This doesn’t seem charitable to other men to encourage their wives to look at you (I don’t mean to sound arrogant as if I was God’s gift to women.  I am simply relating my experiences).

I understand not wanting to be a fat slob, and some of the young boys are really skinny and weak from doing nothing but playing video games.  But I don’t think inciting attraction in other men’s wives is a very Christian thing to do.  Women can and do lust too.

Yes, women, especially younger women, are always on the lookout, sizing up men according to their socio-sexual rank, among other things. But very few men can elicit a sexual reaction from women like Cameron did. Those few men who are able do so are reaping the benefits of genetics and upbringing, so they really don’t need to try very hard. In contrast to women, men are not as acutely aware of the impact they have on women, nor are they so hungry for female attention in itself. Cameron was unaware of this until two women made explicit remarks. For men, coitus and especially insemination is necessary to obtain an ego payoff of comparable intensity.

The Shame of Illicit or Unintended IOIs

Contrary to what women might claim, there’s nothing shameful about the body itself. The shame arises when an individual presents his/her body as a vector of lecherous lust and illicit temptation outside of marriage.

Ed Hurst summed it up like this.

“There’s nothing shameful about the human body.  What is shameful is exhibiting that body to people whom God says don’t have the proper privilege for seeing it.  Outside of the covenant marriage bedroom, no one is authorized by God to see it.  There’s a reason that, after the Fall, God gave Adam and Eve coverings that they didn’t need before the Fall.  We are fallen; we need covering.  Covering symbolizes a whole range of things.”

When Ed talks about “exhibiting the body”, he means the nude body, or the body in very revealing, provocative clothing, which in many cases, is casually labeled attention getting. But a woman doesn’t even need to show her skin suit to do this. Remember NovaSeeker’s axiom: To women, ALL attention is sexual attention! Depending on the socio-sexual rank of the man, sometimes this attention is wanted, and other times, it is not.

It is for this reason that men always have to be careful whenever they are interacting with a woman in a formal setting. If a man does anything that might be interpreted by her as an Indicator of Interest (e.g., a smile, extended eye contact, frequent interaction, or simply failing to break off a conversation in a curt and decisive manner), a woman will interpret this as a sexual advance, whether it is intended to be or not!

Women’s propensity to interpret everything through a sexualized lens is all very taxing on men, especially to those men who can’t measure up to the hypergamic expectations of the female’s imaginations. This phenomenon is greatly exacerbated because of the centrality of sex in Western culture.

Visual Gatekeeping in Marriage

What I have described so far is just one side of the coin. The other side is how wives (and some husbands) fail, or even refuse to show off their bodies to their spouses. This is surprising, seeing how women crave attention like men crave sex, as Deti described above. So we have to ask ourselves why this is.

In some cases with people who have a hot body and a heady libido, this takes the form of hard gatekeeping, i.e. refusing visual or sexual access to one’s body, sometimes called “closing the door” (in the physical sense) or “putting up a wall” (in the emotional sense). In other cases with people who have a weaker sex appeal or who have an insufficient determination to preserve sexual inclinations after marriage, they simply stop making any effort. This is colloquially called “letting themselves go”.

Imagine a husband who comes home after a long, unnerving day at work, and he wants some genuine affection from his wife — a titty show or a lap dance — to set himself in the proper mood to share the evening with his family. After all, “women’s bodies are nothing to be ashamed of”, right? But this is not the response that many husbands get from their wives upon coming home. Suddenly and for no apparent reason, the wife is “ashamed” of her body, and proceeds to hamsterize a different kind of Plausible Deniability, all done in an effort to close the door on him.

  • “I’m too tired.”
  • “I have a headache.”
  • “I need to take a bath first.”
  • “I need to do X, Y, Z… right now. Maybe later…”
  • “The kids are in the next room. They might hear us.”

Isn’t it funny (in a cynical way), how women are quite eager to show off their bodies to everyone and his handsome cousin, except the man God intended them to show their bodies to? They want to be sexually objectified by the world, but at the same time, they want to be taken seriously by their husbands. It should be the other way around.

If we compare women’s need for attention to mens’ need for sex, then a woman who forfeits mens’ sexual attentions by “letting herself go” is like a man clipping his own balls off! Going into decline must be suffocating to a woman’s desire for attention! And yet we see not just a few, but lots of women taking this path! (We also see lots of women going to extensive lengths to maintain a youthful image too, all in an effort to preserve her sexual currency assets in garnering that precious attention.)

The only motivations I can come up with as to why a woman would do this to her husband (i.e. intentionally deny him regular visual access to her body), is just sheer hatred for the man in the case of “closing the door”, and hatred for herself in the case of “letting herself go”. (This might explain men’s visceral disgust for blimps.) She might also simply hate the fact that she’s no longer free to swing from one tree stand to another in the open market.

This dynamic works the other way too, with a few variations in the respective sexual currencies. Just as a woman who covers up or blows up after marriage is defrauding her husband out of some measure of joy, a man who quits his job, and chugs his way towards having a beer belly is doing an injustice to his wife.

Given the centrality of sex in Western culture, for a man (or woman) married to such a person, it is easy to understand how temptation and/or shame (for both men and women) is always no farther away than the adjacent office cubicle or a few clicks on a mating website (e.g. Ashley M@dison, Bumble, OnlyFans, Tinder, Tumblr, etc.).

Food can stay fresh past the expiration date with proper care

In the title of this post, I stated that sexual competition continues after marriage.  By this, I don’t mean competition for sexual intercourse (as in swinging), but rather competition for sexual market position. Married individuals have a responsibility to stay crisp and fresh, and remain the primary object of their spouse’s desire. In our grandparents’ day, this wasn’t always so important, but in the current oversexualized cultural climate, it has become essential in avoiding a decline in social capital (i.e. protecting one’s bank account and reputation), maintaining authority in a relationship, and preventing an affair.

People should know that they need to conform to our God ordained, “traditional” gender roles if they ever hope to be married. But after getting married, they need to continue the same habits that got them into marriage.  Wife Goggles alone can work wonders, but it’s unwise for a wife to put all her eggs in that basket, so to speak.

The same applies for men too, maybe even more so, this day and age.  It’s a losing strategy to allow yourself to grow lazy and complacent, and drop the ball after marriage.

Some readers may object to this by arguing that many wives want their husbands to dress down, and they don’t object when he develops a dad bod.  Be ye herewith informed that there are several ominous reasons for this.

  • It’s much easier to take a casual approach.
  • They don’t want to feel pressured to maintain themselves.
  • They don’t want to feel jealous.
  • They don’t want to deal with the envy of their friends.
  • It reduces the chances that you might ever receive advances or invitations from other women.
  • They don’t want to worry about you ever having an affair.
  • It cuts down your ability to employ Dread Game, which is one of the most effective tools of wife management.
  • It reduces your authority over her body and her sexual desire, thus giving her a false sense of comfort and control.
  • It reduces the opportunities that you have to advance yourself in life.

In sum, it assuages her ego needs and gives her greater leverage of control over her husband’s life.

Men, don’t fall for this!

It goes the other way too. I’ll offer my own story on this.

Case Study 1 — Teaching my wife to be presentably attractive

My wife has a very voluptuous body.  When I met her, she had a habit of dressing in baggy raggy, ripped-up cottons.  I asked her why she always dressed down.  She said it was less time consuming, more convenient, more comfortable, and it averted a lot of unwanted attention from men.  I told her, “No, I am a Christian and a professor.  As long as you’re with me, you’re going to dress and act like a lady.” I took her shopping and bought her some elegant clothing.  This made her feel loved, and it also renewed her self-esteem.  Then whenever she acted in a manner that was unbecoming of a lady, I pointed it out and took her to task.  Sometimes I had to instruct her about the particulars.  In the early years of our marriage, this made her angry.  She said I was too demanding and too controlling, but I did not admit her argument.  Over time, she eventually realized that being a lady had its own set of benefits, and that I was dead serious about this expectation, and then she started to shape up.

Focus on your own marriage first

The last four memes shown in this post compare how a woman carries herself when she is in a relationship with a man to how she presents herself when she is not formally attached. We think these memes are funny because they are true, but actually, it is sad. When a woman is single, she’s fishing for (sexual) attention and so she presents herself as sexually vivacious. When a woman is in a relationship, she doesn’t need to do the work of playing the honey and displaying her sex appeal to her man in order to get attention from him, although she should if they are married. She also feels ashamed of herself for doing the same things to attract attention as she did before. Women who show this kind of change between being single and taken are quite self-centered at heart. It should be the other way around. She should be working to attract and keep her man’s attention while being respectable in public. But we know very few women are actually this way.

It works the opposite way for men. When men are in a relationship, they have a venue in which their ego needs can be fulfilled, and they can therefore grow and shine. In addition, Preselection draws more interest from other women. So the challenge for married men is to stay focused on the woman they’re with.

Case Study 2 — Cameron

I want to go back to Cameron’s comment earlier in this post. He is aware of the effects of his sexual presence, and this is a good quality for a man to have.  However, I think he may have been focused on the wrong things.  His first priority should be to consider the overall impact that his physique has on his wife.  But instead, he was thinking about how his appearance thrilled other women, and then he felt self-conscious.  His wife’s friends may have felt envious, but provided that his marriage is solid, his wife probably felt thankful to be married to him — and blessed!  Cameron’s manly physique is undoubtedly a vector of his wife’s attraction to him.  Moreover, it is his scepter of his sexual authority over her desire. (Sorry, I don’t mean to strafe Cameron by pointing this out. I just want to provide an alternate viewpoint for the sake of discussion.)

Think about this from a man’s perspective.  Would you want your wife to get fat and dress like a hag, just to prevent other men from looking at her?  Is this the right way to avoid introducing temptation?  No, you would want your wife to look her best at all times.  Her cleanliness, hair, physical appearance, and style of dress are a representative social expression of her righteousness, her SMV, her authority over her husband’s body (i.e. his sexual value and desire), and the sum total contributes to the glory of God! The same goes for men too.

Food can stay fresh in the proper container

Instead of taking the easy route, both husbands and wives should do what they can to maintain their SMV after marriage, because one of the top priorities of marriage is to keep your spouse titillated with the sensual pleasures of your body.  The best way to avoid an affair is to hold your spouse’s sexual attention with regular visual and sexual treats. If any person wants to throw their marriage to the rats and encourage the other to have an affair, the easiest and fastest way to do this is to become slavishly lazy and out of shape such that all sexual desire is obliterated.  Add on top of this a little bit of carelessness and disrespect, and this will surely do the trick.

When a husband and wife get fit, dress up, and look their best, they are expressing their identities as a sanctified married couple and children of God.  They are also putting competitive pressure on all those around you to step up their game and increase their own social value.  As Christians, we should not shy away from this challenge by holding the lazy thought that by doing so, we are merely increasing temptation or giving a sin a foothold.  Do not focus on sin and the flesh, but instead, focus on emanating the power and the glory of God.  I like to think that the Holy Spirit would make this clear to the believer, however it seems that wives need to be continually reminded of the importance of looking attractive, yet modest.

In short, all this is to say, be someone that other people want to be around — especially your spouse.

And also, keep her on her toes, gentlemen!

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About Jack

Jack is a world traveling artist, skilled in trading ideas and information, none of which are considered too holy, too nerdy, nor too profane to hijack and twist into useful fashion. Sigma Frame Mindsets and methods for building and maintaining a masculine Frame
This entry was posted in Attraction, Authenticity, Boundaries, Building Wealth, Choosing a Partner or Spouse, Clothing, Confidence, Conserving Power, Courtship and Marriage, Desire, Determination, Female Power, Game Theory, Glory, Headship and Patriarchy, Health, Holding Frame, Influence, Introspection, Joy, Love, Male Power, Maturity, Personal Growth and Development, Models of Success, Moral Agency, Personal Presentation, Persuasion, Purpose, Relationships, Respect, Self-Concept, Sexual Authority, SMV/MMV, Stewardship, The Power of God, Vetting Women. Bookmark the permalink.

120 Responses to Sexual competition continues after marriage

  1. SFC Ton says:

    If a woman gets fat, doesnt put out, treats a man poorly etc etc it’s because she doesn’t value the man/ doesn’t fear loosing access to his cash, his hang down and baby batter

    Marraige transfers power and authority from the man to the woman and the state. The lash is in her hand. She knows it. She’s going to use it.
    .
    Most women also know they aren’t particularly high value. Marrying her makes most men beta chumps in her eyes

    It is extremely likely women get fat, bitchy etc in marriage because the man disgust her and she doesn’t want him between his legs. She does those things subconsciously as a form of birth control, in an attempt to save her eggs for a higher value man

    Which brings us back around to my 1st sentence

    Liked by 3 people

  2. cameron232 says:

    Gotta get kids to school but briefly:

    “But very few men can elicit a sexual reaction from women like Cameron did.”

    I put on a decent amount of muscle for a 40-ish guy and some fat (I disagree with DS on this – in my experience and according to some studies women like upper body muscle even if it comes with some extra fat within limits – btw – I lost a fair amount of muscle trying to cut to look like the pics DS posted)

    DS is correct you can put on muscle with training volume but it’s harder as you approach 50.

    I got some “whoa’s” from a couple of 30-something housewives (one has a beanpole hubby and one has a chubby hubby) with children and a few young hotties at work (which as the girls explained is probably more my status as dad.

    So don’t get the wrong impression I have great genetics or represent some “very few men”. It’s the dad/stable hubby plus in decent shape/kept my head of hair through genetics thing. Just context for my stories – more on the meat of the post later.

    Like

    • “…I have some reservations about the Christian bodybuilding thing you see promoted on some Christian Manosphere sites. When I used to lift weights and got fairly big, women definitely noticed, including Christian women. One of [my] wife’s friends made an explicit remark [about my physique], and another Christian friend of hers told [my] wife how she wished her husband did the same thing.

      This doesn’t seem charitable to other men to encourage their wives to look at you (I don’t mean to sound arrogant as if I was God’s gift to women. I am simply relating my experiences).

      I understand not wanting to be a fat slob, and some of the young boys are really skinny and weak from doing nothing but playing video games. But I don’t think inciting attraction in other men’s wives is a very Christian thing to do. Women can and do lust too.“

      I commend caring about the temptation of others, but this is not a reason to not do the activity when it can be countered effectively by other solutions. For instance,

      A. Helping other husbands develop good nutrition and lifting habits. Of course, they have to want to do it as well, but at least I’ve

      B. Wearing more modest clothing (same thing we tell women to do).

      I put on a decent amount of muscle for a 40-ish guy and some fat (I disagree with DS on this – in my experience and according to some studies women like upper body muscle even if it comes with some extra fat within limits – btw – I lost a fair amount of muscle trying to cut to look like the pics DS posted)

      I agree with you. I’ve always said most things are a spectrum or bell curve. When I talk about lifting in general it’s based on that too.

      A sligh majority women tend to like the “Greek God’ physique the most. Then some others will like the bear look (muscle but with some fat on it) and swimmer look (thin, lean, and some but not a lot of muscle). Some less may prefer big men with less muscle or skinner men.

      Each individual woman may prefer one specific thing though. I think this can vary over time both between men and women. Once I started lifting I noticed I tended to prefer more athletic/fit women over more curvier but softer women I did before.

      If you lose a fair amount of muscle getting to a certain physique it obviously won’t have the same effect, so for your body it may be better to have more of that bear type of physique and everything that entails. Could have been to aggressive with the cut as well.

      Liked by 1 person

      • cameron232 says:

        I think with respect to the Greek God physique it may be a supply thing. This physique isn’t common in the real world. The genetics, work, discipline, willingness to “juice”etc makes it comparitively rare. Women can be calibrated towards real world men even if they see stuff on TV because their hindbrains tell them these are the actual men available (someone at Dalrock’s discussed this). The “some extra muscle, some extra fat” may be acceptable. My wife called my elevated muscle/fat stage (205 bodyweight at 5’10”) “beefcake” and she liked it. I may have gained as much fat as muscle. Real expecations for real world men I guess. I won’t take steroids, HGH or estrogen blockers – no juicing. A lot of guys juice – you’ll find the needles all the time at the bro gyms (concentrated in big cities). I see it in Orlando but not at the local YMCA.

        I’m finished anyway with the prospects of a hulking upper body – I tore my left pec – the tendon to bone attachment. If I have one piece of advice for novice lifters – do not bench heavy with a wide grip – and I define heavy as “over 200lb” not “over 400lb” or whatever.

        18″inch grip measured from inside index finger to inside index finger – these dumbarses that create these lifting sites didn’t tell me this.

        Like

      • @ cameron

        I think with respect to the Greek God physique it may be a supply thing. This physique isn’t common in the real world. The genetics, work, discipline, willingness to “juice”etc makes it comparitively rare. Women can be calibrated towards real world men even if they see stuff on TV because their hindbrains tell them these are the actual men available (someone at Dalrock’s discussed this). The “some extra muscle, some extra fat” may be acceptable. My wife called my elevated muscle/fat stage (205 bodyweight at 5’10”) “beefcake” and she liked it. I may have gained as much fat as muscle. Real expecations for real world men I guess. I won’t take steroids, HGH or estrogen blockers – no juicing. A lot of guys juice – you’ll find the needles all the time at the bro gyms (concentrated in big cities). I see it in Orlando but not at the local YMCA.

        Supply/demand thing is possible.

        I’m not talking juicing at all though. Brad Pitt in fight club is a common physique that both men and women seem to like a bunch or Chris Evans and Chris Hemsworth. Those don’t require juice. Brad Pitt’s at least you can get within about 1-2 years of consistent lifting and nutrition, but longer if you futz around.

        Anyway, the point I’m making is that I’ve never seen any man, regardless of any common ‘dating deficiencies’ such as he’s way shorter than average like 5’3″, who can’t get a date if he even gets somewhat muscular. When 60-70% of men are overweight or obese, it’s simple to rise up above that at least in terms of getting a muscular body.

        I’m finished anyway with the prospects of a hulking upper body – I tore my left pec – the tendon to bone attachment. If I have one piece of advice for novice lifters – do not bench heavy with a wide grip – and I define heavy as “over 200lb” not “over 400lb” or whatever.

        Yeah, wide grip bench is potentially injurious… don’t recommend it either. You can stick with only DBs and machines and do fine if you want to be safe. Maybe slightly less effective if you limit barbell options (aside from lower body movements) but fairly safe.

        Like

      • cameron232 says:

        @DS,

        1980s Mel Gibson. He was average height and muscular/well built but not greek god. Women really dug him.

        “Anyway, the point I’m making is that I’ve never seen any man, regardless of any common ‘dating deficiencies’ such as he’s way shorter than average like 5’3″, who can’t get a date if he even gets somewhat muscular.”

        There’s an opposite problem – men who are very tall and light boned. It is very hard for them to get muscular enough to not look gangly. Try putting 20lbs of muscle on a 6’4″ skinny guy – he still looks skinny. Some famous cases of guys like this in the online lifting world – they often have to take steriods/drugs and lift obsessively to get rid of the gangly look. I’m actually glad with my smaller frame, I’m average height.

        Height (despite what manosphere says) is not always an advantage.

        Like

      • @ cameron

        There’s an opposite problem – men who are very tall and light boned. It is very hard for them to get muscular enough to not look gangly. Try putting 20lbs of muscle on a 6’4″ skinny guy – he still looks skinny. Some famous cases of guys like this in the online lifting world – they often have to take steriods/drugs and lift obsessively to get rid of the gangly look. I’m actually glad with my smaller frame, I’m average height.

        You’re definitely correct there. If you’re 6’0″ or taller it takes proportionally more muscle to look not skinny.

        I definitely think this is an issue for the men who are taller who don’t work out and are confused why they they may be rejected a bunch. They have the advantage for height, but it can be an issue if they don’t have enough muscle mass on the frame to not look skinny.

        Like

      • Random Angeleno says:

        I am under six feet tall to start and then I am so skinny and such a hard gainer that it has always required a brutal amount of work to gain weight sufficient to getting IOI’s on any regular basis.

        Now that I’m older, I’m finding it extremely easy to get injured when pushing hard. Some of these have developed into nagging issues that take months to heal. Hence I’ve fallen back to body weight exercises and resigned myself to not being able to leap into the top 20% physically.

        It is what it is. Have to work on other ways to show value.

        Liked by 2 people

      • @ Random Angeleno

        Now that I’m older, I’m finding it extremely easy to get injured when pushing hard. Some of these have developed into nagging issues that take months to heal. Hence I’ve fallen back to body weight exercises and resigned myself to not being able to leap into the top 20% physically.

        A lot of newer hypertrophy research suggests that doing a bunch of reps for anywhere in the 5-30 rep range is effective for hypertrophy.

        If you’re getting injured pushing harder at the lower reps where the intensity is high, I definitely suggest hanging out at high reps for a while. That seems to help injury proof my muscles and joints when I do that.

        People also don’t like machines but they’re a solid option if free weights are also feeling like they’re going to cause injuries.

        Liked by 1 person

      • cameron232 says:

        I quit deadlifting heavy becuase it doesn’t really make you all that big and I felt the risk was too high (I round my back no matter how much I try not too). I busted my left pec tendon too. Getting old sucks.

        I got into bodyweight for a while. I got into doing pistol squats with kettlebells – I’m too fat and inflexible to do them now. I could do one arm pushups but only with feet spread wide and grabbing the back of my thigh with nonpushing hand. I could never even get close to one-handed pullups – insanely hard.

        I am now trying barbells again but with lighter weight, higher reps. I also think you need a lot more days between lifting when you get older. Trying to keep up with the young whippersnapprers at work.

        Liked by 1 person

      • cameron232 says:

        BTW i’m really skinny too. 5’10” and a natural weight of 160 -ish, maybe less. My wedding ring size is a 7 to give you an idea.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Oscar says:

        1980s Mel Gibson. He was average height and muscular/well built but not greek god. Women really dug him.

        It was the mullet.

        Liked by 2 people

    • SFC Ton says:

      I had fewer women notice me but harder reactions when they did when I hit 904 in the squat.

      The best for me (@5’8″) was when I was a light weight pro strongman and just over 230 pounds

      I feel the best mentally, emotionally etc at 250.

      T9 be under that I have to grind uard with the fasting and what not

      Like

      • cameron232 says:

        As far as I can tell women couldn’t care less about lifting numbers – they react to physical look.

        I couldn’t unrack 900 pounds if my life depended on it. I couldn’t stand up with 900 lbs on my shoulders if it were gently placed there if my life depended on it. THat’s like Mark Henry/Brian Shaw type numbers.

        If that’s what you squat you’re a demon from hell or something.

        Liked by 1 person

      • SFC Ton says:

        LOL raw guys are doing over 800 pounds every day vs me wearing the full get up but thank you, got me invited to worlds….. where I took 5th so maybe entry level monster?

        Guys in my old weight class break a grand on the regular. I think dudes are near on benching that these days

        Have meet but don’t really know Brian……he is insanely strong but absolute strength isn’t really the pro strong man speciality these days.

        He is a very intelligent and buiness savy man. We should all expect to see bigger and better things from him

        Liked by 1 person

  3. cameron232 says:

    Oh yeah, quickly. One of the “whoa!” housewives just told my wife she thinks her hubby might be having trouble with “function” – she’s not sure but he doesn’t seem interested in sex. My wife told her to advise him to “start lifting weights it increases your T”

    I don’t think she should have told her that. Women tend to compare their husbands to other women’s husbands. This man is significantly older than his wife (or me). It’s harder because of age. I don’t think encouraging women to compare their husbands to other men is charitable.

    Liked by 2 people

    • I don’t think she should have told her that. Women tend to compare their husbands to other women’s husbands. This man is significantly older than his wife (or me). It’s harder because of age. I don’t think encouraging women to compare their husbands to other men is charitable.

      Yes, this is something that should be done man to man or husband to husband. If the husband is told by another husband that his wife started making comments about other men’s muscles then at least he’s been warned and has the chance to do something about it from a place of brotherhood.

      When it’s done wife to wife it can easily sow discontentment.

      Liked by 3 people

  4. lastmod says:

    so much for love, trust, building something……..

    why did you all get married? if it was going to be “keeping HER on her toes” and catering to what she wants? SOunds exhausting. Sound odd…because the married people I saw (my parents) NEVER played so games with each other. Shame on you all

    And to think I thought I was odd? I actually may be more red pill than all of you. Imgaine that?

    Liked by 1 person

    • thedeti says:

      You know why. It’s because the sex rev (1) unmoored sex from reproduction and monogamy; and (2) removed all of women’s sexual restraints. But that wasn’t really enough, so society went to (3) restraining and shackling men.

      Liked by 3 people

      • lastmod says:

        sound like men did the shackling themselves. Feminism greatly benefitted men too…….well, the ones that get the IOI’s…….the dates, the opportunities TO date, the sex, the three date rule…..whatever.

        It was liberating men from responsibility as well……and most men took advantage of it, and now play this victim slot of “this shackled men” most went in head first when the sex was there……….I know men “can’t” help it, but the lower rungs “just had to deal” and “tough breaks”

        If this is such a chore, a bore, and almost impossible to vett (excpet if you are DS, ROissy, Roosh, and the other lucky ones) you have to be Red Pill, use a gazillion tools, ro “you’re marriage is gonna fail / all women are like that”

        Really actually feel sorry for most of you now…….you seemed to not have vetted properly or your sex drive you couldn’t control…and then blamed it on women.

        My was out of control…..but no outlet. Had to “deal” and “burn” and “tough breaks” it through it all…..even now. Older, but far from dead.

        I had a drug addiction, had to beat it…….deal with it. You guys seem unable to control your passions and deal. The fact is, no one ever told you NO. Your god saysmuch about sexual immorality…but that seems to get ignored by you “can’t help it, god made men this way”

        So then why did he say it?

        I;’m not doing a gotcha, but from what I see now at my age………marriage is terrible and has been for a long time. You guys made this choice, knew what you were getting into…..and now a bunch of tools to help “tip-toe” and “keep her in line…or else!”

        Or else what? Divorce? Its pretty common today and most (men and women) somehow survive and even if the man is raped in court…he seems to line right back up for some more. Like an addict “the next high will be better, longer….and satisfying”

        IDK….I am speaking from an area I know little about. I just saw what I saw growing up. My parenst were lucky I guess. I guess I was lucky to see this and have this.

        Liked by 1 person

    • professorGBFMtm2021 says:

      LASTMOD,my extreme redpill bro!”We see the light in our darkest days”thats what RIOTCITY says!Heres MR.PIBBS:ITS NICE TO LIVE IN A EASY WAY ,DAY TO DAY!I’m in a very jolly mood last!I got a smoth ,easy taste!
      Thats what I’m saying my parents,your parents they go into marriage worried about the carnage of the last 40 years especialy?I admit I barely care about 99% of life!Hence why I have never done even maryjuana or drink alcohol ever!You know GENE SIMMONS saw the destruction such things bring in late 60’s and 1970’s first hand mostly from ace”paul”frehley &peter criss right?Why I have never done drugs or hard drink(Not even ale at those MANOWARtm meet-ups at SMITHS OF SMITHFEILD on charter house street!After HELLONEARTH LONDON2019! because I never cared too mostly!Guess how many danceclubs or concerts I have gone too?ZERO!!Why I never cared, you think a guy who listens mainly to metallicized MEATLOAF opera music is big on fitting in?That sound right?What I talked to with WIMMINZ what I want too and if they don’t like it?Theres the door!This is my life!See now why I told ”TFH/ANON you mess with my 70’s bro again, I’ll sick EVIL MANOWARtm guys on you”!?After his update to ”THE MISANDRY BUBBLE” on 01/01/2020!He know they hate guys who not love ”HAIL TO ENGLAND” like wMANOWARRIORStm do!P.S.You see this trust,love stuff on MARRIEDWITHCHILDS?AL BUNDY like I&OLE’ALFIE we mgtow don’t give a S#$$ers at heart!

      Like

      • lastmod says:

        Have no idea what you’re talking about my man

        Like

      • thedeti says:

        You’re not reading carefully enough, then.

        GBFM actually makes some good points in between all the incoherent ONECOCRULEAINTNOFOOLBUTTHEXBERNANKIFIED stuff.

        Liked by 2 people

      • professorGBFMtm2021 says:

        I mean you want to be a part of marriage madness today?Like TFH/ANON or if your hip IMRAN KAHN from sinularity2050.com always singling you out for attacks what is marriage last 40 years especialy?Husband evil that was first at courts while it became KOSHER for most WIMMINZ CHURCHIANZ! I thought everybody knows what I know thats what I always think!I think everybody on here, knows most of what I do see how I’m diffirent than most types LASTMOD?I don’t usualy think doing these things I just go on autopilot like when I talk to WIMMINZ.I’m remembering ROISSY’s 16 commandments?Of course not!100%True story know how I remembered my first girlfriends last name?It rhymed with one of my friends last names!Otherwise out of sight,out of my mind like if I wanted to get married with all this GAME stuff or DRISCOLL stuffP.S.Ever dance to ”NEW YORK CITY BOY” after it came out in 1999?in NEW YORK CITY LASTMOD?I know music see even if I not realy care for it!

        Like

  5. Novaseeker says:

    This is surprising, seeing how women crave attention like men crave sex, as Deti described above. So we have to ask ourselves why this is.

    Attention for women is like visual sexual stimulation for men in the following specific way: repeat stimulus from the same source diminishes in stimulation strength over time, all things held equal. This is why men famously seek out “visual variety” with their eyes (and unfortunately this is a driver of consumption of porn). And it’s also why women value “fresh” attention from “new men” more than they do attention from someone whom they have already gotten a lot of attention from.

    Note that this doesn’t mean that women don’t like/want attention from their husbands, or that men are not visually attracted to their wives. Both are the case. It does mean, however, that the “edgier buzz” of the “dopamine hit” from a visual thrill or attention thrill, respectively, comes from strangers/others and not from the well-known source.

    Liked by 4 people

  6. bee123456 says:

    “Sometimes I had to instruct her about the particulars. In the early years of our marriage, this made her angry. She said I was too demanding and too controlling, but I did not admit her argument.”

    This is good advice; don’t admit her argument.

    While dating and engaged I spoke openly with my wife about my need for regular sex in marriage. Several times my fiance at the time tried to shame me for my sex drive. I refused to admit any fault and told her that God had made me a man, that men get excited through their eyes, and God had not give me the gift of celibacy. After 3 tries, she has dropped the subject and has not mentioned it for over a year.

    Liked by 3 people

  7. thedeti says:

    Why is my comment in moderation?
    [Jack: Graphic language and profanity filters. (You quoted Roissy.)]

    Like

  8. Scott says:

    One interesting aside is the difference in the way men and women handle the issue of their friends significant others attractiveness.

    Men appear to have a very wide boundary around commenting on their friends wives beauty. We say things like “you got a good woman there, Brian” and other nebulous, non-descript compliments. You can think my wife is sexy, hot, cute whatever. But I don’t want to hear it. And we generally respect that space.

    Women seem to be far less inhibited by rules like that. Not only do they talk about it, they have no problem sharing it with their husbands. “Susie at work thinks you are hot” is a pretty common.

    Liked by 6 people

    • Scott says:

      … here’s the ting. Don’t you dare point out that some random woman at your own work was flirting with you. Even if you preface it with “this totally gross woman who I have absolutely no interest in and doesn’t hold a candle to your perfect beautiful body and face made eye contact with me for an extra second today.”

      That one will make your life miserable.

      Liked by 4 people

      • cameron232 says:

        @Scott

        That sounds completely anti-red-pill and does not fit my experience. It didn’t cost me anything – may have gained me husband points for all I know. The biggest problem I can see is the threat she’ll rip into the “hussie” at an office party that includes spouses. P_ssy that I am, I was nail biting over the prospect that when she called the computer lab looking for me (we can’t carry cells) the chick would answer the phone and she would rip into her.

        I told her all of them without names. She guessed one of them. Other guesses I just kept saying “nope, nope.” One she saw a pic of and declared “she’s a 10!” THey will always size up the woman in question.

        NAWALT – I realize different wives will react differently.

        Liked by 2 people

      • thedeti says:

        Cam

        It makes your life miserable if you are like Scott and Mychael who have a really good marriage with strong sustained mutual sexual attraction flowing in both directions. He doesn’t need to say anything like this to demonstrate his value because Mychael keenly and sensitively understands his value. She knows his value damn well. She knows it because she sees other women sizing him up. You think women don’t see that? Oh, yes they do.

        The problem women have being married to high value men is constant vigilance that another woman doesn’t take your man. Or take, or try to take, any of his seed. Because loss of his seed means resource diversion away from her and to others. Because loss of his seed could mean she loses HIM.

        A high value man saying something like “eww gross a woman flirted with me” sends his wife into paroxysms of fear/anger/feeling threatened. She’s not mad at him. She’s scared to death another woman will take her man.

        Liked by 4 people

      • Elspeth says:

        It doesn’t make my husband’s life miserable and we have a blissful relationship. This is because 1) I trust him implicitly, and 2) I already know he’s attractive to other women so why would I punish him for that? I think it would bother me more if he DIDN’T tell me what happened.

        A few years back (our now 12 year old was around 4 I think), we were at Disney and a woman who “knew him when” walked up behind my husband and rubbed her hand across his back to get his attention and “say hi”. Did she see me there? I don’t know. I assumed, having not seen him in 20 years, she was unaware of his marital status.

        But I didn’t freak out. I waited to see how he was going to handle her. He turned around, she went to hug him, and kept her at arms length, grabbed my hand (no hug allowed): “This is my wife, [Els]. Else, this is [Sally] from my old neighborhood.”

        She looked sufficiently contrite for her presumption, we exchanged pleasantries, that was that.

        We have some ground rules. We don’t hug opposite sex people who aren’t blood relatives or sufficiently aged for the hug to be benign.

        We are zealous of one another and pretty possessive but the implicit trust really crowds out jealousy of the level that causes contention.

        Now…it hasn’t always been like this but it has been for quite a long while now.

        Liked by 2 people

      • cameron232 says:

        @Deti that could be teh differenence. I am not as high value (physically or SES) as Scott.

        Like

      • cameron232 says:

        @deti, also my wife tends to not really like or trust other women very much. I could see where her anger or upset gets immediately projected onto them not me (in no case did I do anything wrong btw).

        Like

      • @ Scott

        … here’s the ting. Don’t you dare point out that some random woman at your own work was flirting with you. Even if you preface it with “this totally gross woman who I have absolutely no interest in and doesn’t hold a candle to your perfect beautiful body and face made eye contact with me for an extra second today.”

        This is not really a one size fits all thing. Though pointing it out generally is much less effective than her seeing it for herself as otherwise it can come off too crudely.

        If a husband is unattractive to his wife and starts getting interest from other women then it’s likely that his wife starts throwing out fitness tests. If he passes them then it’s likely to increase her attraction for him.

        If a man is already attractive and his wife is fearful of losing him, then it’s not effective because he is already passing fitness tests. She needs more comfort than to see interest from others.

        I think deti already specified the your situation (Scott and Mychael).

        I’ve seen a lot of the former (husband is unattractive to wife, he gets more interest from other women, wife starts being more attracted and the dynamic flips) on reddit’s RPC and MRP.

        Liked by 1 person

    • thedeti says:

      It is perfectly OK for women to comment about their husbands’ hotness. Or the hotness of others’ husbands.

      It is NOT OK for men to comment on the hotness of other wives. Because you’re treading on someone else’s territory. Or stating a desire to tread on his territory. And we don’t get to do that.

      Men size up women for attractiveness and whether they’ve hit the Wall. But men size up each other for threat potential. Whenever a man encounters another man, in a split second he does a threat assessment and comes up with “imminent threat”, “threat”, “possible threat” or “no threat”. We men have to do this with each other. And we all do it. It’s part of that hardwiring.

      Liked by 5 people

      • Novaseeker says:

        Whenever a man encounters another man, in a split second he does a threat assessment and comes up with “imminent threat”, “threat”, “possible threat” or “no threat”. We men have to do this with each other. And we all do it. It’s part of that hardwiring.

        Yes. Then that is followed up with a determination of who is higher in the overall hierarchy (not necessarily SMV hierarchy, but whatever hierarchy is the relevant one for the context) — if this isn’t obvious for obvious reasons, it’s ferreted out by a kind of cautious interaction and assessment between the two of them to figure out who stands where with respect to the other, and then once that’s settled, they can relate normally and comfortably. If it isn’t settled, and/or if they reach different conclusions in that assessment, tension remains and will be resolved somehow — either by one removing himself from the space, or by some kind of conflict.

        Liked by 6 people

      • thedeti says:

        Then that is followed up with a determination of who is higher in the overall hierarchy

        Yes. As between two men, they figure out who is the “dominant” one, and proceed accordingly. We do it because it’s the most efficient way to get what we both want and need without someone ending up in a hospital and the other ending up in a jail cell.

        Groups of men do the same thing. Put a group of men together and they will immediately and without prompting organize themselves into a hierarchy, with chiefs and warriors, leaders and followers, order givers and order takers. The problems happen when one or more men either don’t know their place, try to move out of their places without promotion from the leaders, or don’t fit into the place the hierarchy put them.

        Liked by 3 people

      • Novaseeker says:

        The problems happen when one or more men either don’t know their place, try to move out of their places without promotion from the leaders, or don’t fit into the place the hierarchy put them.

        Yes.

        This can come up with father in law and son in law relationships. If the father in law, for example, won’t “cede” hierarchy over the daughter and/or in the son-in-law’s home or something because FIL considers himself to be perma-patriarch-of-everyone-until-he-dies type of thing, that leads to disastrous results. Either SIL concedes hierarchy to FIL and W loses respect and marriage dies (even if it isn’t a divorce), or FIL tries to assert hierarchy over SIL and creates a conflict for W, where she may vacillate, or even choose FIL over SIL, or go back and forth between SIL and FIL and so on. It creates a mess. And it’s typically on the FIL in these situations because the FIL either doesn’t want to cede hierarchy generally, or because he doesn’t think SIL is “worthy” to cede hierarchy over W, so he doesn’t … and then it proceeds to destroy the marriage.

        Thankfully I didn’t have a FIL like this (one less problem lol), but I have observed this in other scenarios and it’s bad when it happens.

        Liked by 2 people

      • Ame says:

        Interesting, Novaseeker, this is exactly what happened with my first husband and his father. His father refused to concede his authority over him and tried to impose it on me. It caused great mental anguish in my husband. He could never reconcile all of that. Thing is, his father would never have allowed anyone to do to him and his wife what he did to us.

        Like

      • thedeti says:

        This can come up with father in law and son in law relationships.

        I do have a father in law like this. And when this happens it is much like the mother in law/daughter in law situations but with more direct confrontation.

        I have had to, well, in no uncertain terms, tell FIL to butt out and that some things are none of your business and I’m not going to take this sh!t, especially not in a house I pay for and you will not talk to me that way and I don’t care who you are. And “who do you think you’re talking to, I’m the man you gave your daughter to, remember? If you have a problem with that, I’ll give her back to you and you can take care of her. You don’t like how I do things? YOU DO IT, THEN, AND YOU PAY FOR IT.”

        Those were, well, rather uncomfortable conversations to have at the time. I wish I’d had those conversations in year 1 or 2.

        Liked by 3 people

      • SFC Ton says:

        Whenever a man encounters another man, in a split second he does a threat assessment and comes up with “imminent threat”, “threat”, “possible threat” or “no threat”. We men have to do this with each other. And we all do it. It’s part of that hardwiring.
        ……

        Gonna have to disagree with that

        Like

      • Novaseeker says:

        this is exactly what happened with my first husband and his father. His father refused to concede his authority over him and tried to impose it on me. It caused great mental anguish in my husband. He could never reconcile all of that. Thing is, his father would never have allowed anyone to do to him and his wife what he did to us.

        Yes. It’s the “I Am The Patriarch Of Everyone For As Long As I Live” syndrome that some men have. A proper relationship here has the FIL as a kind of “honored elder” or “patriarch emeritus” — he has influence by virtue of who he is, but he doesn’t directly exercise power or try to do so, and instead accepts that the sons/husbands in the next generation exercise their own power in their own domains. An improper relationship is where the “honored elder” tries to remain “active powerful ongoing Patriarch” over the internal workings of the families of his children — when that happens, all hell breaks loose, literally, because it is against the intended design, and therefore the actions are not blessed in the least — far from it.

        Parents are to be “honored”, but the father in law is not the Patriarch of the family of his son or of his daughter. Some men can’t accept that — often because they do not have a high enough opinion of the son and/or SIL that they are trying to exercise authority over to “trust him” to do it himself. But it misreads the situation totally. It isn’t a matter of “trust”, but of “role”. It is simply not his role, and when he oversteps his authority like that, it incurs wrath.

        Liked by 1 person

    • cameron232 says:

      “Women seem to be far less inhibited by rules like that.”

      Oh dude that ain’t the half of it. From what I can tell, women talk about all sorts of stuff with each other. Susie don’t like to have sex with her husband because it’s too big or whatever, Bettie’s huband aint functioning properly, Chrissy’s hubby is the minute man or can go for hours.

      NAWALT I’m sure. But If you’re a married dude your wife’s friends probably know how long you can go for, etc. My wife flat out tells me the crap women say about their husbands (negative and positive) without identifying who she’s talking about.

      I’ve never heard a dude talk about e.g. how tight her poon is or isn’t, what great BJs she gives. Just some fundamental difference in teh sexes I guess.

      Liked by 4 people

      • Jack says:

        Here at this blog, I’ve often written that “Women lust too”, and “Women are sexually oriented”, but this is putting it politely. Behind closed doors, women will shamelessly and graphically discuss all manner of debauchery with screeching laughter and sacrilegious glee. This is why the herd is so influential, and why it’s important to vet her friends.

        Anyone who has worked in manufacturing can tell you that the women there are 10 times more profane and sexually graphic than even the worst of the men.

        So does that include “Christian” women?

        Youbetcha! But they’ve been taught to conceal this behavior.
        https://notesfromaredpillgirl.com/2020/11/06/girls-just-want-to-have-fun/

        Liked by 4 people

      • Elspeth says:

        Me and my friends don’t talk like that. At all. We do acknowledge -out loud- the favorable qualities of one another’s husband’s but always respectfully. The word “hot” for instance, is never used.

        Handsome? Yes. Hot? No.

        Liked by 3 people

      • cameron232 says:

        Men will talk about nasty stuff regarding one-night stands and short term relationships. But not typically wives. Women will talk about husbands.

        Liked by 2 people

      • cameron232 says:

        “Me and my friends don’t talk like that. At all. We do acknowledge -out loud- the favorable qualities of one another’s husband’s but always respectfully. The word “hot” for instance, is never used.”

        That’s white-pilling Elspeth, thanks. My wife has told me things women tell her (without devulging who and frankly I don’t want to know). This is in the context of Christian (non-demoninational) Mom’s groups. I don’t know how common this is – but I was suprised at the difference because my buddies at work (who can be quite potty mouthed) don’t talk about their wives.

        Liked by 2 people

      • Elspeth says:

        White-pilling? Huh.

        Here’s the thing though. It’s not only looks though. In fact I really only ever recall it said that my husband is “good looking”. But if someone’s husband is smart, or grows a nice beard or whatever, it’s really not a thing to acknowledge that.

        You’re right about the wife thing, though SAM has often fielded inquiries and advice about how “well-behaved” his wife is. Men don’t mention the looks of one another’s wives. He says that is true.

        Liked by 2 people

      • Scott says:

        Elspeth

        When modern women use the word “handsome” in that context they are being polite.

        I have received texts, right after dropping in to Mychaels work where she says things like “the girls here go crazy when you come in and I kind of like it. Because you’re mine.”

        The she puts a bunch of hearts and devils horns and flirty stuff.

        And like Cameron, I don’t care which ones it is. It’s just an observation.

        Liked by 1 person

      • cameron232 says:

        @Elspeth,

        What I mean is: you saying that women in your circle don’t talk like that is white pilling.

        I was fairly bothered by the knowledge that women in a Christian mom’s group talk about their husbands in all sorts of (negative and positive ways) that include details that aren’t anyone’s business frankly

        I work with a lot of ex-sailors, aviators (not the most decent-mouthed men in the world). THey love telling tales of debauchery in Southeast Asian ports. I don’t hear them talk about intimate details about their wife (good or bad). It just shocked me that’s all.

        Years of her attending Christian Mom’s groups – it’s possible that this is a few cases and doesn’t generalize. Or you’re just around a group of exceptional Christians IDK.

        Like

      • cameron232 says:

        Elspeth, I’m glad you comment here honestly. Yes, I am very blackpilled (natural temperment). Rereading the original post I was thinking about every experience of mine with another woman- imagining the common characteristics of them – well it blackpilled the hell out of me WRT women. I realize you’re not all like that. My dear wife isn’t like that. But I see the same thing over and over.

        Liked by 1 person

  9. thedeti says:

    Never mind. I see why. It’s in the italicized part which I should have edited. Jack, please check this, edit as necessary, and pull it out of the mod folder.

    Like

  10. thedeti says:

    Without having read everything in this densely packed post:

    It brought me back to men’s Achilles heel: P*ssy Makes Men Stupid.

    Fortunately, Roissy considered this many moons ago. Commandment 10:

    X. Ignore her beauty.

    The man who trains his mind to subdue the reward centers of his brain when reflecting upon a beautiful female face will magically transform his interactions with women. His apprehension and self-consciousness will melt away, paving the path for more honest and self-possessed interactions with the objects of his desire. This is one reason why the greatest lotharios drown in more love than they can handle — through positive experiences with so many beautiful women they lose their awe of beauty and, in turn, their powerlessness under its spell. It will help you acquire the right frame of mind to stop using the words hot, cute, gorgeous, or beautiful to describe girls who turn you on. Instead, say to yourself “she’s interesting” or “she might be worth getting to know”. Never compliment a girl on her looks, especially not a girl you aren’t [having sex with]. Turn off that part of your brain that wants to put them on pedestals. Further advanced training to reach this state of unawed Zen transcendence is to sleep with many MANY attractive women (try to avoid sleeping with a lot of ugly women if you don’t want to regress). Soon, a Jedi lover you will be.

    He also taught us:

    “Show me a beautiful woman, and I’ll show you a man who’s tired of [having sex with] her.” (This really is true.)

    It’s also expressed at the Red Pill subreddit more succinctly as (paraphrasing):

    “She’s just a woman. They’re just women. Yes, she’s a hot woman. Yes, you’re insanely attracted to her. Yes, she’s got everything you want (on the surface). But remember that she has the same composition, same genitals, same hard wiring, same software, and same quirks and faults as any other woman you’ve ever known. The differences are her experiences, and the outer packaging is shinier and prettier (to you).”

    This is also one of the most difficult things for a man to do because it is in every way counterintuitive to his hardware (heh) and software. All that programming is designed to give you a really bad case of oneitis: command your attention, break down your tough exterior, and get you to stay with her and start investing time and money so that you will keep her from dying or getting killed, and then sire her children and pay for them to keep them from dying or getting killed. It’s there to convince you it’s much better that YOU die or get killed than they die or get killed.

    I’ve been there. I’ve met at least a couple of women during my lifetime who had 90% of what I wanted (my programming convinced me at the time it was 110%). I’d do anything for them. And I do mean anything. Waste time. Spent money I didn’t have. Ditched friends. Change life plans. Keep a really bad relationship running on fumes.

    The way you reduce this is to (1) get a lot of experience with women before you choose or commit to one and thus learn that “they’re just women, they’re not special, at their cores they’re pretty much interchangeable/”fungible goods”, and hot women are not better or smarter or kinder or better at relationships or at anything else”; or (2) choose/commit to a woman with a Godly background/experience who understands this power, has others restraining it, and she herself restrains it.

    For most men, including Christian men, (2) isn’t really an option because there just aren’t many women out there with that kind of training and restraint. (2) would be the courtship option or “arranged marriage” or your parents set you up. Or something like that. And so for most Christian men, (1) probably looks like being around friend groups and dating a lot of different women. Approaching. Getting rejected. Approaching, succeeding, and finding out after some time spent together that the pretty shiny packaging doesn’t make up for the worthless crap contained within. (You’ll find that out too with enough experience.)

    Liked by 4 people

    • professorGBFMtm2021 says:

      HI,ROISSY!
      I RIDE THE WIND FOREVER FREE!Hi ,DETI!You know I ‘ve been rolling today with RONNIE MILSAP, in my car she loves?Somewhere in the fifties tonight!Then this came on!”I ride alone I can’t see the road to nowhere anymore!And as she fell in the night she said don’t cry I’m leaving you”!I of course said ”I’m forever free you cold hearted b tch!Thats from steve/blackies sexual pervs album in ’89!You wish you had this much fun 24/7 while not giving or taking a S#$$?ZERO S#$$’Slike I&ROLLO!You know that happened to myself in feb,2018 at ABC’S GENERAL HOSPITOL?First one of my day nurses came in then within 10minutes their was 8 of them,while I’m watching TEEN TITANS(HI,STARFIRE&OTHER GIRL!) on my hospitol tv!Then I said BASTA!,they having watched SANFORD&SON knew what that meant as they cleared ou of the room!See my work at EXTRA DEEP STRENGTH’S BIBICALMANOWARtmhood DETI?My public has demaned a new callin show for sexy 79 year old knockouts and thats what I&ROLLO TOMASSI&MR.SNURDLEY BO’GOLDEN?Is going to give them with ”SGT.PIBBS LONELY HEARTS CLUB” A radio show mainly for 79 year old knockouts like on DAL’ that time with women over 55 THROUGH WITH MINZ post!See my professor part of name?Professor of MANOWARtm studies like LORDSHARKLY!
      DETIP.S. Should’nt that be it makes most feral WIMMINZ STUPID TOO!?P.S.BO has’nt told ROLLO TOMASSI yet of our new radio show hes too busy with religion right now! MR.PIBBS says SGT.PIBB’S is for keeping the memories deti of all 79 year old knockouts!

      Liked by 2 people

  11. professorGBFMtm2021 says:

    Bodyshops with ROLLO&MOTLEY&GIRLS,GIRLS,GIRLS!Raising hell in LA,I’m a good boy,just tell me a story!whu,ha,ha, those GIRLS,GIRLS,GIRLS at all these strip joints in los angeles!HI,DALROCK&ROISSY&JACK,How y’all get those pics of my day nurses surrounding me with fawning!?I fell a hunger,a hunger,at night are you the anwser?I can hear your heart beat faster,take me home tonight girls!I need guardian day nurses!Just like ronnie said ”be my nurse honeys”!Hey ROLLO look,(WHERE?)THERE!That one dancing down the sunset strip!They look best off their feet!

    Like

  12. professorGBFMtm2021 says:

    LASTMOD, I’M talking about don’t even think of getting married in the animal house[UDO OF ACCEPTS’87 SOLO ALBUM] of todays world!You think I’m getting the marrying bug?Look at all this carnage just on the MANOSPHERE,Let alone on MARRIEDWITHCHILDREN!In other words ”CARE NOT FOR THE WORLD NEITHER THE THINGS IN IT OR OF IT”!What is of the world today is it not mayhem?You need that?

    Like

  13. cameron232 says:

    Defense of some middle aged, over-BMI women.

    No excuses for Jabba-the-Hut-ess. But middle aged mother’s bodies present some difficulties mens’ don’t. Thyroid and hypothalamus,, pituitary problems are more common in women and those glands are in a feedback loop that can be hard to treat medically – “here take some Levothyroxine” doesn’t always work.

    Women get things like uterine and cervix fybroids that can be baseball (or bigger) sized things (multiple sometimes) that are mass that push their tummies way out (they don’t cause thunder thighs and wildebeest butts). Ironcially, they get these from being fertile/feminine (they are induced by high estrogen levels). The doc’s solution? Cut out all her girl parts and make her a eunuch (because a lot of doctors are stupid or lazy.).

    Elspeth commented on the extra 20 or 30 that is hard for middle aged women to lose. Oh, by the way, I am carrying some extra now from the Halloween to New Year’s period.

    Not a defense of the lazy landwhale who downs entire boxes of Little Debbie.

    Like

    • feeriker says:

      Some of us are actually attracted to the little bit of “extra padding” (NOT roll after roll of wavy lard) on her that comes with age and life. Something extra to squeeze..

      Liked by 2 people

      • thedeti says:

        Yes. Because they look like women. Not girls. WOMEN.

        Those strategically placed adipose tissue deposits are exactly what women are supposed to have, where they have them. Hips spread out a little bit. Little bit more junk in the trunk than there was 10 years ago. The trunk is a little bigger, little more spread out, and a lot curvier. Some sag at the bust but it’s BIGGER and curvier.

        Yes.

        Liked by 2 people

      • cameron232 says:

        A high school buddy of mine calls it “big in the right places.”

        Liked by 2 people

    • thedeti says:

      Maybe it’s just me. Or because I have a daughter in her early 20s.

      But middle aged women look good to me. First, there are a lot, and I mean a LOT, of women between 35 and 55 who take excellent care of themselves, watch their weight, have good makeup and hair, and really put themselves together every day. Lots of reasons for that, chief among them that (1) so many of them work outside the home and being “put together” is expected in professional settings; and (2) so many of them are sexual marketplace participants. They are out there dating, having relationships, and having sex, kinda sorta like they did in college and before their first marriages (but not really, you know what I mean). Women of any age have to be put together to participate in a sexual marketplace.

      It can’t be overemphasized that this is something that has really changed from my childhood and adolescence in the 1970s and early 80s. There just weren’t this many unmarried middle aged women. There just weren’t this many middle aged women who looked like “Stacy’s Mom”. The MILF was “Mrs. Robinson” from The Graduate” or characters Ann Jillian portrayed (look her up – Ann Jillian is the proto-MILF). There just were not anywhere close to as many of them as there are now. It’s a brand new, never before seen thing in society. You just didn’t have this many women in middle age looking, appearing, and acting in overtly, frankly sexual ways. American society did not look like this at all circa 1978-84.

      Second, as I’ve aged, I’ve just noticed women who correspond roughly to my own age because of common interests and because I “know” them and they “know” me. We all understand each other. We come from similar backgrounds, time periods, shared experiences, and common cultural influences and social milieus. We just walk, move, operate, think, and feel the same ways based on the same internal and external cues.

      Third, women in their 20s don’t appeal to me because I have a daughter in her early 20s and I notice women of that age only with paternal eyes and attitude, I guess. They aren’t sexually interesting to me. I’ve frequently had occasion B.C. (Before Covid) to return to my alma mater and would see students walking on campus. Men on college campuses look like boys. Women on college campuses look like they’re… not women. They look like girls. Literal girls. They’re not fully done yet. No thank you.

      Liked by 2 people

      • Scott says:

        Yep..

        20 somethings look and sound like children to me.

        Liked by 2 people

      • “First, there are a lot, and I mean a LOT, of women between 35 and 55 who take excellent care of themselves, watch their weight, have good makeup and hair, and really put themselves together every day. ”

        Yep, at my gym there are some 30s, 40s and even 50’s (guessing by the hands and necks) somethings who are putting in the WORK. They look good. A couple are there with their daughters, who don’t look as good even when 20+ years younger. Dumpy and unkempt. Obviously not paying enough attention to Mom’s example. Sad.

        Liked by 2 people

      • cameron232 says:

        I may be semi-publically confessing my perversion. I do not share the attraction-aversion to 20 something girls (although in general I try not to be a visually lustful man). Sometimes their voice throws me off when it sounds like a little girl. But objective physical attractiveness.

        Maybe there is a “preference” for late 20s vs early 20s. If I were single would I attempt to go there even if I thought I had a snowball’s chance? No. Do I think there is a weirdness to such a relationship? Yes.

        Liked by 1 person

      • cameron232 says:

        The standard outfit for young girls at my job is what I’d call “business casual hotpants.” Skin-tight pants made out of some sort of business suit like/color material. If they are chesty, this is accompanied by an undersized, low-cut shirt.

        THis is worn with high heels. I guess the heels do this – they have a butt-swaggering walk. I don’t know how to describe it. This is what you see when they leave your cubical, etc. So this is what 20-something girls are like in the workplace.

        YOu can be a decent man with a Christian conscience, a loyal husband and father, be incapable of starting something with them but I don’t see how you can’t notice – it’s right in your face.

        Liked by 2 people

      • Elspeth says:

        My husband says the same thing, Deti, and mostly for the same reasons. He looks and 20-something women and thinks “daughter”. And he says they sound immature.

        Liked by 1 person

      • professorGBFMtm2021 says:

        SCOTT&DETI!You know what I was thinking when y’all started this 20yearolds look like kids?This COME ON BABY ,AMERICA!Not know this J-POP hit?YOUTUBE!
        Did’nt know it was love after surviving!Felt so easy when I was young,Love was looking me in the face or realy at my STYLING&PROFILING superstar BILLY GRAHAM(HULK HOGAN&RICFLAIR in 1970’s!) 24-INCH PYTHONZ before vinny.k forced enhancers on him!I guess I’ll be going silent now!

        Like

      • Scott says:

        I have kind of a protective/dad instinct around them.

        Funny story though. I am currently away from home and have been for about 6 weeks on a contract. Be home soon though.

        I’ve been hand writing love letters to Mychael, for the fun/sweetness of it. I call it our “boyfriend and girlfriend stuff.”

        One of the 20 somethings asked me what I was mailing and squeeled with “aww you two are so cute!!!”

        She apparently went home and told her boyfriend “Dr Klajic has been married for 14 years and hand writes letters to his wife.” And scolded him for not being like that.

        I didn’t mean to get any boyfriends in trouble.

        Liked by 4 people

      • Novaseeker says:

        Yeah I’m like this as well — generally speaking women in their 20s read as “too young” to me. I notice the beauty — it’s not possible not to notice — but they aren’t in the zone where I perceive the beauty as “actionable” in a sense. It’s more artistic. It can still be striking, though. I was on a business trip in Cancun in 2019 and was on the elevator heading back to my room after some meetings — it stopped at the “beach” level and on stepped a couple of mid-20s European girls in very skimpy bikinis, still dripping wet from what I presume was a pool swim, speaking one of the Scandinavian languages. One of them was model-level — just a living work of art, to be honest. But not interesting to me other than in that observational way. A woman who was the same level of attraction who was 40, though? Now that would grab my attention in a very different way.

        I also agree with you, as I have written elsewhere, that the percentage of truly hot older women has dramatically increased. More women are really, really working it at these ages now, for the reasons you state — many of them are single and participating in the SMP, and want the looks leverage. An attractive 45 year old woman — one who is toned and hot — can date any man from late 20s to 60s, no problem. And they often do. I personally think it’s actually harder to date one of these women, if you are in their age-peer group, than it was to date the equivalent when you were, say, 32, because these women have less competition and therefore more market power than their 32-year-old equivalents.

        This is also reflected in the OASIS. The OASIS isn’t only, and in fact isn’t mainly, 20-something girls. Women in their 40s and 50s are in on things, too. Obviously a much smaller percentage, because it’s a smaller percentage who are attractive enough, but that smaller percentage is still much more than it ever was in the past. You can go to Instagram and easily find dozens of women in that age range who look nothing like women in that age range ever looked in any meaningful numbers as recently as the 1990s.

        Like I said, High School never ends, folks.

        Liked by 2 people

      • Lexet Blog says:

        Do you have kids?

        Like

      • cameron232 says:

        @Nova, I guess this is what I mean – noticing.

        I do not mean something like “explicit thoughts of plowing her.” This is something (regardless of the age of the woman) that men have complete control of. Something willed and something that is a sin that must be confessed but can and should be avoided in the first place. Something that should have you asking yourself “if my spouse did this would it bother me?”

        But yeah, noticing – they don’t make it real easy not to.

        Liked by 1 person

      • thedeti says:

        Yeah I’m like this as well — generally speaking women in their 20s read as “too young” to me. I notice the beauty — it’s not possible not to notice — but they aren’t in the zone where I perceive the beauty as “actionable” in a sense.

        Thanks for stating it better than I did. Women in their 20s are aesthetically pleasing. I appreciate the aesthetics. Some of them are EXTREMELY aesthetically pleasing – living works of art, as you said.

        It’s just that they are not sexually interesting, at least not to me. They read as “too young” and “off limits” and just “not fully developed and not ready”. And, well, just not “attractive” in the literal sense in that they don’t attract my sexual interest.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Novaseeker says:

        Do you have kids?

        Yep.

        Like

      • thedeti says:

        Do you have kids?

        Yes. I explained I have a 21 year old daughter in the post you replied to. I think that is a major reason why I view this particular subtopic as I do.

        Like

  14. professorGBFMtm2021 says:

    Give me the future of ass-rape in court?Once a beautiful ms. america married a beta-provider!Born on a stormy night ,give me the hell of a modern girl!Thats whats waiting for MINZ out here! WANTMORE? For the good of therock &roll in your tender heart,for the good of onehelluava night!Jim saved the original BATOUTOFHELL2:BACKINTOCHURCHIANMARRIAGE in ’81,While being BAD FORGOOD!While MEAT wanted a MODERN GIRL in ’83 on a new freeway to hell!You listened to these modern girl lyrics?He wanted future ass-rape in court!See why I listen to sensible songs usualy like ”BLOOD OF MY EX-WIFE” now!?

    Like

  15. feeriker says:

    Anyone who has worked in manufacturing can tell you that the women there are 10 times more profane and sexually graphic than even the worst of the men.

    Or any workplace or public setting.

    A decade ago I was on travel for work and about a half dozen of my male colleagues and I were having dinner at a local sports bar. At a nearby table sat a young, very attractive black woman who was obviously well educated and middle class (i.e., not a “hood rat”). She got all of our attention quickly, but for all the wrong reasons. Her conversation with her girlfriends was not only extremely loud, to a decibel level where the entire place could here it, but literally every other word was an “f-bomb.” Every.other.word. It was bad enough that three of us guys who had served careers in the Navy were embarrassed and uncomfortable with it and it actually ruined our dinner. I can’t even remember what this girl and the other chicks were talking about, but I remember thinking “is there ANY topic of conversation, no matter how crass, that requires THIS MANY “f-bombs?” I know that this was an extreme example, but it is, in my experience, generally representative of how women will talk amongst themselves in setting when the think they’re away from male ears (obviously this woman had no such filter).

    Liked by 3 people

  16. lastmod says:

    “You’re not reading carefully enough, then.”

    Mr. Pibb….nonsense….dance….stuff about london……..yeah, he makes some really great point. Over my head, as most everything is. Glad you find him insightful.

    I read and speak English where I live, not a rehashed english post-nuclear war type of english

    Like

    • professorGBFMtm2021 says:

      myBROTHER,LASTMOD, Is the EXALTED leaders of soceity out here telling you anything close to truth?
      Thats the point!,What does GENE SIMMONS spiting fake bood mean?Anybody take that serious?Modern-life is a joke!What you think the point of GBFMtm has been all these years?Once ”they” smashed down most of life by the 1970s what happened?Tons of drug use &gangs!What is most of HARDROCK/METAL?Nihilism!Like most music!Why?People don’t care anymore about truth or holding back the worst in WOMEN which trickles down to everything else eventualy this started in 1800s &excellerated after womens voting!!
      I agree with you about broken-spirit!What you think all that ”GREATBOOKSFORMENtm &ACHILLES& EXALT THE WORDS OF MOSES&JESUS” was about?Not this very thing!?What you see as non-sense is pointing to something else!Everybody is’nt ANON!You want custom advice this better?All this women angels stuff still is pretended to be some truth!I point to the truth while trying to be entertaining that’s naturaly myself ,you want I to pretend to be someone else!See MANOWARtm/MANOSPHERE/REDPILL/PUAGUYS sending armed guys forcing themselves on people?This is what mainstream soceity does and is backed 100% by most people out here!Mainpoint is this honor/decency is a joke to 99% of people especialy women!Hence all this GAME&REDPILL talk!The custom help you want might not exist anywhere,do you beleave that might be true!?This is not modernism?How we can all be billionaires,perfect bodies&gods best friend or even super-intelligent?I or anybody else here tell you anything like that?Do any of us beleave that were going to have all the goodies stuff?I’m pretty intelligent,lots of people are!But that dos’nt mean much today!I know your intelligent too LASTMOD!Why you think people are trying to hinder you or something when no one but ANON was?We can only give you what we got!Just like yourself!People on drugs you ran into, could they give you the help you needed or could they only not try to make it worser on you?Is any of us on here trying to make life worser on you?No!Thats government/soceitys job!

      Like

  17. lastmod says:

    “Whenever a man encounters another man, in a split second he does a threat assessment and comes up with “imminent threat”, “threat”, “possible threat” or “no threat”. We men have to do this with each other. And we all do it. It’s part of that hardwiring.”

    What freaking world do you all live in? You all do this with every man you meet……nonsense. You would spend all day “dealing with this potential threat assessment” you all work professional jobs in safe neighborhoods.

    I live in a crime ridden city, that is the butt of jokes nationwide (and I like it here actually). I live in a rough non-white neighborhood and have never had an issue with anyone. I live in Fresno and I do have to “watch” myself but everyman I bump into on the street isn’t a “threat assessment”

    Honestly living like that would make any interaction by you be perceived as initially hostile. Probably not a good thing in my neighborhood where gunshots are heard frequently, even during the day.

    Like

    • Scott says:

      I’m am ambivalent about it.

      On the one hand, I am aware the dynamic and jockeying that goes on, but I’ve never really paid much attention to it.

      I’ve generally been pretty aloof to it and distracted by just enjoying myself.

      Like

    • thedeti says:

      Yes. Men do this without even thinking about it. They’re really not all that conscious of it.

      You do this too. All men do – to know where to go, when, safely; and how to avoid getting injured or killed. It’s just that you don’t think about it.

      Liked by 1 person

  18. lastmod says:

    Women have hit the wall at the age of 30…..NOW…women in the 40’s and 50’s are hotter than normal. The opinion, metrics and everything stated as “gold” and “red pill truth” changes by the week here

    Like

    • thedeti says:

      No.

      Unmarried women in their 40s and 50s are hotter now on average than they were circa 1980. And there are many, many more of them. And men like me notice them because of our comparable ages.

      THAT is what I said.

      Like

      • cameron232 says:

        As far as attractive 30’s 40s 50s I suspect this is pronounced in New York, DC, etc. Yeah, I bet a lot of women in the big, rich metros keep themselves up better than in the old days, especially single ones.

        I don’t believe women all “hit the wall” at 30 and so marry at 29.9999. The women I’m around – to me by late 30s they are almost all past peak attractiveness. I suspect the “hit the wall at 30” narrative is as much a reflection of the fact that women’s fertility declines rapidly in their 30s (on average. for some women it’s even worse). I think late 20s a lot of women have instictive anxiety about this but I don’t think that makes them unattractive. IMO the woman I work with with the highest objective attractiveness is turning 30 shortly.

        Like

  19. lastmod says:

    Never look at young women. If I was a dad, women that age (early / mid twenties) would be my daughter if things actually worked out for me. It’s effing creepy and not normal to even entertain that….and I as a man my age doing that to your daughter would rightfully earn me a left hook, as it should for all men.

    Like

    • cameron232 says:

      When I was a boy, every other dad had a Playboy subscription. I bet most of their models were in their 20s. Middle age men find those women attractive

      I was probably the worst in the discussion above but even I highly qualified what I said. – I said it’s inevitable a man will notice these women when you have no choice but to endure them parading themselves around you. I don’t think you should leer, shouldn’t lust, etc. Nova mentioned being stuck in an elevator with bikini’d model, etc.

      Like

      • Elspeth says:

        Youth is, for the most part, beautiful. Is what it is. Noticing that is not a sin.

        I do think that between the hair dye (yeah, I’m a henna girl myself), the proliferation of cheap gyms, and the nutritional knowledge -and wealth, even if fake- that we have accumulated over the past several years, there are more women in their 30s, 40s, 50s, in general, who are able to navigate life without that defaulting to that matronly look that was standard when we were kids in the 80s and decades prior.

        Older women will never, ever look as good as 20-something women, but a larger than historical percentage maintain enough attractiveness to be noticed by men their age.

        And I didn’t even mention things like skin care (even over the counter), the benefits of drinking water, etc. My grandmother, or even my mother, would never spend the kind of time and money that I and women my age spend on skin care. They didn’t even go to dermatologists unless there was a pressing medical urgency, unlike us today, LOL.

        But overall, outside of the major metros, and among women who married, 40-something women tend to still be overweight.

        I have been on a personal crusade the past 10 years telling my white middle aged friends to stop doing the asexual haircut thing at 45.

        Their husbands should thank me, seriously. I’ve done many of them a huge service, 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • cameron232 says:

        Yep – my wife had a friend – she chopped her hair off at about 30 so that she looked like minivan mom. The girl didn’t have an especially pretty face – but she had beautiful naturally curly platinum blonde hair – this was her best feature and she destroyed it.

        I don’t understand when women don’t want to optimize their best features.

        Liked by 2 people

  20. redpillboomer says:

    “Womens’ underlying purpose of denying this reality is so that they can dress provocatively to attract mens’ attention and still avoid contingent responsibility for any unwanted consequences that might arise.”
    I’ve really noticed this at the gym in how the women attire themselves to workout. It’s actually a ‘fine art’ in that setting I’ve noticed. It really jumped out at me the other day when a younger, attractive female came to workout in BAGGY clothing-Sweat pants and a too big sweat shirt. At first my mind was like, ‘Wha???” Then it struck me how accustomed I’ve been to working out around women that dress attractively in their gym attire, but every single bit of clothing is form fitting, there is absolutely no baggy stuff anywhere to be found in that gym except on some of the guys working out. Now, I’m not complaining, I enjoy my eye candy as much as any other guy working out there, and as long as the eye candy is diligently working out, everything’s cool (I don’t like people–male or female- lounging around in a gym hardly working, especially attention seeking females; fortunately this gym has none of that). Here’s the rub: It occurred to me after this, that all the women specifically selected THOSE outfits, when they bought them and are now wearing them to workout in, to get the attention of ALL of us men including me. They want us looking at every curve and line they’ve got. They don’t want the men staring or hitting on them, unless it’s Chad, Brad or Tyrone, but they want us ALL–EVERY ONE OF US- subtly checking them our for the ATTENTION/VALIDATION it gives them. Just today, I was looking at the women in the gym thinking, you wore that for me and all the guys in this gym to get our attention. You don’t want us creeping, but you definitely want us looking, why else go to a GYM looking like that to WORKOUT? The girl in the baggy sweats was so COUNTERCULTURAL it’s unreal when you stop to think about it.

    Liked by 1 person

    • cameron232 says:

      That’s one reason I dont’ go to gyms. My brother in law had a girl who flat out came after him at the gym. I didnt’ have anythign like that but I had embarassing things like some girl who decided to pick up one of those fixed barbell weights and squat right in front of me in her yoga pants when the whole friggin gym was practically empty.

      Like

    • Novaseeker says:

      It occurred to me after this, that all the women specifically selected THOSE outfits, when they bought them and are now wearing them to workout in, to get the attention of ALL of us men including me. They want us looking at every curve and line they’ve got. They don’t want the men staring or hitting on them, unless it’s Chad, Brad or Tyrone, but they want us ALL–EVERY ONE OF US- subtly checking them our for the ATTENTION/VALIDATION it gives them. Just today, I was looking at the women in the gym thinking, you wore that for me and all the guys in this gym to get our attention. You don’t want us creeping, but you definitely want us looking, why else go to a GYM looking like that to WORKOUT?

      Certainly.

      In fact, entire clothing lines have been built around this attire. It’s a very lucrative market segment, because women will pay up to look hot when they are working out. Some of the second-skin type athleisure stuff has sheer panels and so on as well, which pushes it even further to something closer to lingerie/bedroom hosiery. That clothing is designed that way for one reason, and it isn’t athleticism.

      Liked by 2 people

      • redpillboomer says:

        “Some of the second-skin type athleisure stuff has sheer panels and so on as well, which pushes it even further to something closer to lingerie/bedroom hosiery. That clothing is designed that way for one reason, and it isn’t athleticism.”
        Exactly! Well put. It is the workout equivalent of bedroom lingerie. In fact, I remember one female telling me a long time ago, we don’t wear that stuff for ourselves (lingerie), we wear it for you men. It’s attire for our guys because you like it so much. She further said, yes I feel pretty and sexy in it, but I’d rather wear an old, comfy football jersey to bed or just sleep naked. If it wasn’t for you (men), we women wouldn’t even own any lingerie, serves no purpose for us.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Novaseeker says:

        we don’t wear that stuff for ourselves (lingerie), we wear it for you men. It’s attire for our guys because you like it so much. She further said, yes I feel pretty and sexy in it, but I’d rather wear an old, comfy football jersey to bed or just sleep naked. If it wasn’t for you (men), we women wouldn’t even own any lingerie, serves no purpose for us.

        Oh that’s what they say, but it’s wrong. I mean they’re not being misleading in terms of not wearing it if they were sleeping alone, that’s true. But they wear it for themselves in the sense that they like the attention that being alluring gets them — it turns them on as well. Women very much like being alluring — but being alluring requires someone there to be allured. So yes they wear it because a man is there (or is anticipated to be there), but … that’s only a part of the story. They very much enjoy being alluring, and it’s the same for lingerie as it is for athleisure — it’s as much for themselves as it is for men, it’s just not for their own comfort — it serves other purposes for women, which women are will to sacrifice comfort for.

        They don’t want to say that because when does a woman ever say she is doing anything to be attractive to men because they like the attention and they enjoy being alluring to men? They never say it. But it’s obvious that they do.

        Liked by 1 person

    • SFC Ton says:

      LOL one of the things I use to do was train hard in private gyms, then go to commercial gyms to do asstaint work, pre hab/ re hab stuff and pick up chicks

      Women love men with power bodies but they don’t want to see the blood and sweat

      Liked by 3 people

      • cameron232 says:

        WHen I did my monster lifts (monster for me) I turned a lot more male heads than female heads. Of course this was lifting at the YMCA not a real bro gym – it’s what we’ve got here in our medium city.

        I could legitimately pull 500 and squat high 300s at my best. I used to like to outlift the bigger local bodybuilder bros – show them what a skinnyfat old guy can do. WHen I loaded 475 one time I heard this short bodybuilder dude say to his buddy – “he ain’t gonna be able to get this” – the best motivation in the world – “oh yeah?” I hit 475 for 5 – my blood pressure must have been 10000 psi. I always wanted to pull 3x my bodyweight but I never got there.

        Liked by 2 people

      • SFC Ton says:

        LOL that’s awesome! And 5 hundo is perfect.

        Girls in general responded well when I overhead pressed but not to anything else.

        The Girls saw me lift one time, said its extremely scary and never followed me to another meet.

        Women don’t do reality and I know I said this before but I watched a group of hair dresses ask an elite level lifter who the strongest guy in the gym was. He sheepishly said himself self, they said no, who really is etc etc

        They meant who was the pro body builder vs an elite level 308 pound power lifter

        Liked by 4 people

      • SFC Ton says:

        That’s smart boss!

        I was an elite level soilders then a near on elite level power lifter

        Both wrecked my body in ways most folks would never understand.

        And I am fair certain the power lifting wasn’t worth it.

        At least the soilder thing had a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow;)

        Liked by 2 people

  21. Joe2 says:

    Now, I’m not complaining, I enjoy my eye candy as much as any other guy working out there, and as long as the eye candy is diligently working out, everything’s cool…Here’s the rub: It occurred to me after this, that all the women specifically selected THOSE outfits, when they bought them and are now wearing them to workout in, to get the attention of ALL of us men including me.

    Don’t be fooled all may not be what it appears to be. Businesses such as singles bars and car dealerships can and do use female moles to create ambiance and upsell customers on services.

    Go to a car dealership for a simple oil change. While waiting for the work to be completed, an attractive female in a short skirt and tight blouse sits next to you to go over what their technicians found and their recommended services. She seems to be genuinely interested in you and your car. Nope, she’s interested in your wallet and is using sex appeal to wear down any resistance to the upsells.

    At a singles bar there are attractive females having a great time talking and laughing. They make themselves available and approachable. A beta bucks approaches and buys them drinks and thinks he hit paydirt. Nope, he just hit dirt. The drinks are fake, a concoction with no alcohol, and the females were hired from a talent agency to create ambiance.

    Is a gym any different? Perhaps not. Men would prefer to enjoy eye candy rather than watch an out of shape woman in baggy sweats. They got your attention, otherwise some men may go to another club. It’s probably best for business to have some women around who look like they don’t need to workout to put on a show and create the atmosphere.

    Like

    • redpillboomer says:

      Yes, the whole gym staff is good looking and in great shape. All have nice bodies. I’m talking about the female staff members. Come to think of it, the male staff members too!

      Like

  22. lastmod says:

    “At a singles bar there are attractive females having a great time talking and laughing. They make themselves available and approachable. A beta bucks approaches and buys them drinks and thinks he hit paydirt. Nope, he just hit dirt. The drinks are fake, a concoction with no alcohol, and the females were hired from a talent agency to create ambiance.”

    100% true here. When I was bartending at a night club in San Francisco, there was a “speed dating” night (this was 2006) from 8-10PM once a week for a few months. This died quickly because out of fifty men, maybe five had every woman believing they had connected (best looking guys). Anyone else was lucky to have one or two. The women of course ALL had plenty of men interested in them.

    The group running it had a TON of female plants….above average looking, totally approachable, and it was to wind the guys up who came “women just wanna date and meet guys like you….really!!!” These ladies all got their drinks from the same bartender (all virgin drinks, made to look alcoholic). Gin and tonic in proper glass, presentation, lime….. All tonic. No gin. Same with Mojitos (hated making those d*man drinks), or Cosmo, or Jaegerbombs….

    Everyone would get ready for the speed dating… At the last possible second, these women were gone. Paid in advance by the club… and these women were off to the real party….. and it wasn’t here during “speed dating” night. I watched in utter horror from behind the bar. It was soul killing, and I wasn’t even participating. Seeing countless men crushed….. and these men were not mouth-breathers with thick glasses, greasy hands and bad haircuts…….

    Seeing a plenty of men paying to get into this nightclub (25 bux) and then to have all hope dashed by 10pm. No wonder 99% of the men cleared out when it was over. Too embarrassing to still be there after it was over.

    Liked by 2 people

    • feeriker says:

      I’m amazed that the scam lasted beyond its first night. One would think that word of the truth would hit the streets pretty quickly and that there would be fewer victims the second time around, few enough to shut the scam down in its tracks. It’s difficult to believe that very many men are thirsty enough to be humiliated twice in the same manner.

      Like

  23. lastmod says:

    Anyway, the point I’m making is that I’ve never seen any man, regardless of any common ‘dating deficiencies’ such as he’s way shorter than average like 5’3″, who can’t get a date if he even gets somewhat muscular. When 60-70% of men are overweight or obese, it’s simple to rise up above that at least in terms of getting a muscular body.

    LOL! What world do you live in?????

    Like

  24. cameron232 says:

    Going back to OP, you’re right of course that sexual competition doesn’t end with marriage.

    For women, it can intensify. The few serious relationship issues we have had have involved another woman and the other woman initiated with me (when it comes to picking up women I have zero skills). Less than 3 years into the relationship, a girl I met at university started asking me to go places with her after class. I did. Movie theaters, out to lunch, sneaking into fancy hotels for the thrill of it. Our first HUGE fight – our first real hurt in the only relationship I’ve ever had.

    We had the worst time of our relationship in 2013 – a bad fight that turned physical (not going to share details but I have a bad temper). It wasn’t over another woman but when we were in our cold war, her BFF moved in on me.

    In 2016, a female friend of mine from HS (attractive, divorced) moved in on me on social media (I didn’t exactly stop it). This was another bad fight.

    For the record, nothing happened in any of these – I have not even kissed another woman (not counting grandma and little old ladies at church).

    Honestly, over the course of the relationship she hasn’t taken great physical care of herself most of the time. She has never denied me sex and quite frequently initiates it. One thing: I have a pretty high sex drive and have never been less than very eager to have sex with her. So I can see how she doesn’t need to think (aside from the few other women incidents) that she needs to compete for me when I eagerly do the deed with her.

    I mentioned “young wife” at work who has given me some (ambiguous) attention. Her husband works there (he’s a decent looking guy but a bit chubby). Honesty, I’ll not lie, “young wife” is quite attractive. She is clearly showing off for other guys. She said to me she loves him. I don’t know how she treats him when they are alone. They talked about children – now maybe not having children. I get the impression in some of these young marriages the women want to have a baby but the men don’t. Whatever the case, whatever the cause, there is clearly sexual competition going on there (at least for sexual attention, which you mention is primary for women).

    Like

  25. SFC Ton says:

    I Am The Patriarch Of Everyone For As Long As I Live” syndrome that some men have.
    ………

    Guilty! Though I strive for a light touch but I think it’s important for an extend family to have long term group goals

    Like

  26. Novaseeker says:

    In the sexual competition after marriage AND “high school forever” categories, here is the latest from our friends at the New York “OnlyFans” Post:

    https://nypost.com/2021/02/20/ca-mom-bullied-by-fellow-parents-for-selling-sexy-snaps-on-onlyfans/

    Notice how she turns it around and makes it about “bullying”, when in fact it’s about a community trying to enforce some standards on fellow parents in their children’s school.

    Other interesting sidelights … husband “agreed” to do the OF page to “spice up the marriage”. I suppose that means he gets off on other guys looking at his wife. I also suppose he doesn’t mind the monthly 150k.

    And on that money — again, another reminder that you do not need to be smoking hot to make a lot of money on OF. This woman is attractive, but not smoking hot in my opinion. That’s the precise “niche” that OF seems to work for, in fact. And she’s now making 1m USD, annualized, as a nobody (that is, prior to the press in this article, rather than after it as was the case with Nikole Mitchell), selling softcore porn on OnlyFans.

    Yawn. Same as it always was. Nothing to see here. Move along.

    Liked by 1 person

    • SFC Ton says:

      Gonna make a fairly safe SWAG here and say chicks who are hotter then average but not smoking hot are probably favored by guys looking to escape into the fantasy land

      They know they can’t pull a 9 so their stretch goal is a 7 or 8

      Liked by 2 people

      • Novaseeker says:

        Yes, it’s that and it’s also that guys can see smoking hot 20 something women for free on any porn site all over the internet. What they can’t see is that attractive neighbor wife who is 30, 35, 40 and is in the “real world”, or looks like the women in their real world — OnlyFans caters to that. The smoking hot women are already in porn for free.

        So, in “inversion world”, guys can see smoking hot young women for free, but will pay to see older, attractive but less so, women because the latter are not otherwise available for viewing.

        It’s all about scarcity — what is scarce gets paid for, and what is available for free doesn’t.

        Liked by 2 people

      • cameron232 says:

        @Ton @ Nova: The older woman probably adds an element of realism. THe brain subconciously tells these men they have a chance with her vs. the 22 year old Playboy model. THis is more or less what I think Ton is getting at. Why do men look at so-so girls on Facebook when you can see hotter with google in 0.03 seconds? The dude’s brain says real world girl with possible connection so I have a chance. I didn’t get this until someone explained it to me recently.

        Liked by 1 person

  27. horsemanbombadil says:

    “Ignore her beauty.

    The man who trains his mind to subdue the reward centers of his brain when reflecting upon a beautiful female face will magically transform his interactions with women.”

    THIS.

    I seem to have immunity to “beauty”. Likely because I am 55, been married for 30 years, managed a LTC where 80% of my 300 staff were women. Literally I appreciate a pretty woman…for about a second and a half. There is another one in a minute, kinda like buses.

    At the same time my farming keeps me in shape while I have a closet full of work suits for socializing. Mrs often points out “she was checking you out” not so much because I am any great shakes but because of my honest obliviousness to her self perceived “beauty”.

    My point is once ” beauty” is out of the equation, Is This Person Interesting?

    Mrs can tend and ride our horses
    She can and does pull fence and stack hay
    She is designing our new house build and asks engineering questions “will this wall support?”
    She has an opinion on politics and can back it with reasons (I disagree but she has reasons)
    Mrs follows our portfolio and picks stocks rationally.
    She understands red pill and mgtow and agrees with most of it.

    Is she a beauty? Hell if I know. I been looking at her for going on 4 decades, I dunno.

    But She Is INTERESTING.

    At my state of life women up to say 40 come off as just girls playing at life.
    They all blend together, uninteresting, bland, stupid.

    My thought why marriage is done.
    They are beautiful enough for sex but way too boring to commit to.

    Liked by 1 person

  28. horsemanbombadil says:

    On the gym thing
    Haven’t been in a gym in a decade

    But its hilarious the women going by slowing down to watch us stack hay each June.

    By chance at our barn when we bring in the hay we have to park the wagons right by the highway.
    One of us on the wagon throwing off 500 bales per wagon, two of us picking them off the ground walking them across the yard into the barn, two more out of site inside the barn stacking. Ten plus wagons in a day, 3 day evolution.

    22c+ (75f+) sweating, shirts off. Humping it. Working steady all day.

    And the traffic on the highway SLOWS.

    Our wives think its hilarious.
    Not one of our crew is under 45.
    But the folks out there have not seen men doing man things in so long it becomes spectacule.
    Sad.

    Liked by 2 people

  29. Pingback: The Sexual Market IS the Marriage Market | Σ Frame

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